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禁止訪問

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發表於 12-1-12 21:04 |顯示全部帖子
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大宅

積分: 1524


發表於 12-1-13 02:16 |顯示全部帖子

回覆:老婆揾$揹起成個家, 老公係家庭主男同湊細路。有無擂同?

I'm so touched by this post. I'm only a new mom and always wanted to be a full time mom but financially we "can't"(although I always feel that 平有平養,貴有貴養,and spending quality time with my kid is more important, my husband doesn't agree.) all your posts hv given me insights on how to 擔起頭家, it really is more than bringing home money or doing the housework but also giving the best to the children and husband spiritually, mentally, etc. No matter what my husband thinks I'll try to accommodate that and sacrifice my personal pleasure to make up for the quality time with my little boy. I am a Christian but my husband ain't. This is a long journey but I've made my own choice. We have a lot of disagreements but I know we love each other and we both want the best for the family. Thank for this post and I feel very much encouraged. I'll have faith in our God and I know I (we) can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (us)!



點評

ndw  Thank you for sharing your feeling and feedback. I heard you.  發表於 12-2-5 14:22


洋房

積分: 100


發表於 12-1-15 14:59 |顯示全部帖子
唔明!
頭家係大家!
點解要分得敢清楚!


複式洋房

積分: 278


發表於 12-1-17 17:01 |顯示全部帖子
唉…

點評

ndw  我都:“唉!” Thank you.  發表於 12-1-19 11:37


複式洋房

積分: 212


發表於 12-1-19 09:16 |顯示全部帖子
老公好偉大,加油!

點評

ndw  Thank you!  發表於 12-1-19 11:36


子爵府

積分: 13734


發表於 12-1-19 10:36 |顯示全部帖子
本帖最後由 ndw 於 12-1-19 10:39 編輯
ninekit 發表於 11-11-11 23:52
I can accept that, key is to have the best person to do the stuffs they are good at.

Last weekend, my husband told me the similar point of view.story:
our 3 years old daughter came to me and said: "I want to sit on the pot. Can you watch me?"
I was so happy that finally my husband got her potty trained and happily replied: "Okay."
.... At the moment that I untied her diaper, I found out that there was already some mashed poop on the diaper. and I saw evidence all over her butt to show that it is not just happened.
I dump the poop into another toilet and flush that one. During the process, I use my angry voice to told my daughter not to do it in the future. If she already poop, then, don't ask to sit on the pot. She should had asked to have diaper change instead.

I hate this surprise because I have not prepared a safe way to catch the poop. I walked out and let her sit on the pot for a long while. She kept calling me to get her out. And I still thinking about safe way to catch her poop on her butt without making anywhere dirty and cleaning work afterward.

My husband heard my cranky and angry voice talking to our daughter. And he calmly walked to our daughter and said,"I will do it."

I was and . I felt embarrassed because I am a mother and I cannot stand to take care of my own daughter's poopy mess environment. I know I still have the "Dirtiness Phobic " = 潔癖 in me that I don't know how to cope with it. My reaction to the whole think is terrible. I don't even want to use anything in that restroom even after my husband said he had cleaned it up only for one reason that my husband said he cannot see good to see if any poop still on anywhere outside the toilet and potty ring... He asked me to go check because I have better eye sight on that moment. I think my husband had low blood sugar level on that day so he could not feel well. Then, I continue to act so nervous. I want to use strong cleaning agent to clean everything, stronger than my husband will preferred because he concern my hand will get hurt by the agent. And I cannot find any glove to use to protect my hand that day.

Finally, my husband said:"Let me do it."
I felt so bad. I hided myself to cry about my incapability. But my crying voice had reached my children's ears. My husband confessed to me latter that he had used my crying to give my daughter in potty training a visible lesson. That was not my daughter's first time to do such miss leading signal. It was the first time she did it to me.

After all these has been taking care of and I need to take a shower from head to toe in order for me to feel clean and comfortable again, I said to my husband: "Thank you very much for taking care of this mess. I am so disappoint myself about my reaction on this situation.I have felt short for a mother, a women, can do things. I am depress. . Let me cook dinner Tonight so you can have some rest."

He said:"Don't worry about it. You have done good on what you have trained for. From the way and environment you have been brought up from, I can understand why you are the way you are now. God prepared me for this situation. And God prepared you to do other things that you are good at "





子爵府

積分: 13734


發表於 12-1-19 10:51 |顯示全部帖子
回覆 燚樂 的帖子

“糟糠之妻” ?系呢?乜也為糟糠之妻啊?可否解來我學習學習。

希望我老公使錢時,我無畀老公覺得我畀面色距睇啦。我都識趣啦,老公買乜,我都笑口話:好啊。
講話大聲,這個,大家無論邊個揾錢都唔可以嫁啦。都系要講理0既。


子爵府

積分: 13734


發表於 12-1-19 11:34 |顯示全部帖子
本帖最後由 ndw 於 12-2-9 06:08 編輯
chyhm 發表於 12-1-15 14:59
唔明!
頭家係大家!
點解要分得敢清楚!

系呢?我都唔明,有D乜0野要分得敢清楚!

依我來看,在誰主“外”,誰主“內”方面,男女真系有別,唔可以平等。好似傳統文化裡就蘊壤出女人從有個依靠來取得面子 或 博取得對方的愛,而男人就從可以養起頭家而取得面子 或 博取得對方的愛。無計可變,因為面子始終是由人地畀0既。所以“架”都系要睇下自己兩夫妻唔好分得敢清楚來執翻囖。唉!只有等人民的文化思想來帶起變動。

另外,在具體生活裡頭,在某些方面,真系唔到我唔同老公分得0甘清楚。
如:就今早,我提議老公幫女兒 平安 坐上殘障人士用的輪椅時,前面0既活動臺唔好擺得0甘近 平安 0既心口。為的是 平安 累時可以向前趴著有個休息。老公就唔認同我的看法,他認為 平安 是能夠趴在臺上休息的。而且不能太鬆寬,為的是坐校車時的安全。
此情形,我就要同老公分個清清楚楚現在是誰管“內”,誰管“外”。 既然老公是管“內”,我也不宜多與老公在此事執著我的己見。要執,就必定雖要花上好些時間來互相說理辯論一翻。我們資源窮乏的人哪有這麼多時間來從討論中找出個協議呢。
於是,我還是一句:你話如何就如何啦。然後 收口 閃人 去做我的工作,因為我也不能賴在那而耽誤了我的工作。他也幫不了我的工作。

如果神安排機會給我同老公的崗位調轉時,我都想我老公分個清楚唔好理我管的範圍。 到那時,在管教,照理兒女方面,我認為需如何處理就讓我的。他可以給意見,但不要非要我從他的才罷休。


子爵府

積分: 13734


發表於 12-1-19 11:44 |顯示全部帖子
charleylolo 發表於 11-8-19 11:57
my friend is just like this
Oh, yeah?! How is your friend (he or she) taking it so far? May both of them take it well.


男爵府

積分: 9743


發表於 12-1-22 21:18 |顯示全部帖子
gram 發表於 08-10-8 00:15
我以前是一位小學中文老師, 現在為了照顧兒子而辭職, 太太工作, 她人工高我很多。我負責日常的家庭事務, 生 ...

Add oil....


大宅

積分: 3025


發表於 12-1-24 01:43 |顯示全部帖子
我覺得家家有本難念的經, 每人都有自己的生活方式, 決定, 想法, 不應該用歧視目光看待.

點評

ndw  贊同!  發表於 12-2-5 09:50


子爵府

積分: 13914


發表於 12-1-24 23:39 |顯示全部帖子
你和你husband 是模範夫婦,最重要是你們懂得互相珍惜互相欣賞!

因為有時…即時為了對方做了很多…在對方眼中也不算得上什麼。


子爵府

積分: 13734


發表於 12-1-27 09:51 |顯示全部帖子
回覆 mandelicious428 的帖子

Thank you!

妳所言道真。每人都有自己一套愛人的方法。這方面不能用將心比己來了解對方的愛。只能靠互相信任對方的愛是真的。
溝通時對事不對人. 如:千万不要一開口就底偽對方不愛自己。


男爵府

積分: 5238

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發表於 12-2-2 20:34 |顯示全部帖子
本帖最後由 sfiawong 於 12-2-2 20:37 編輯

回覆 ndw 的帖子

這樣的好男人,我朋友中也有一位。他在三十年前結婚生了三個仔,可能不是富有,入息可能不算高吧。他老婆一下子挾帶私逃,捲蓆式把所有金錢都帶走了。在沒有辦法之下,他只好單獨照顧三個孩子,一邊打工一面湊仔,供書教學全部一腳踢把三個孩子撫養成材,孩子都能自立了,和我們幾位同學遇上了,已是三十年後的事情了。故我很敬佩他的能屈能伸的大丈夫的行為!
我也為他寫了中文和英文詩篇歌頌的徫大啊!

你要身體好、記得時時要飲水、不一定等到等到口渴嘅!


子爵府

積分: 13734


發表於 12-2-5 12:40 |顯示全部帖子
本帖最後由 ndw 於 12-2-5 13:08 編輯

回覆 sfiawong 的帖子

"我朋友中也有一位。他在三十年..."

你的朋友在走這段已過去了的人生路必定艱辛。打動了我的憐憫之心。我絕對不願意挾帶私逃,捲蓆式把所有金錢都帶走了,還連自己所生的孩子也不要,給老公獨個人吃這苦。想當初 我第一次與老公相識,也是因有憐憫之情而看上了他。現在如果拋夫棄女,那當年有的憐憫 之情不是有頭沒有尾嗎?既然我和老公的同一主耶穌基督 愛我們 創始成終,我兩還有甚麼 我們的神指導給世人知的 正義之事 是不能持守到底的呢?

耶 和 華 我的神這麼說 (摘自聖經 和合本 以 賽 亞 書 49:15-16) :

" 婦 人 焉 能 忘 記 他 吃 奶 的 嬰 孩 , 不 憐 恤 他 所 生 的 兒 子 ? 即 或 有 忘 記 的 , 我 卻 不 忘 記 你 。

看 哪 , 我 將 你 銘 刻 在 我 掌 上 ; 你 的 牆 垣 常 在 我 眼 前 。"


摘自聖經 和合本 彌 迦 書 6: 7-8

耶 和 華 豈 喜 悅 千 千 的 公 羊 , 或 是 萬 萬 的 油 河 麼 ? 我 豈 可 為 自 己 的 罪 過 獻 我 的 長 子 麼 ? 為 心 中 的 罪 惡 獻 我 身 所 生 的 麼 ?世 人 哪 , 耶 和 華 已 指 示 你 何 為 善 。 他 向 你 所 要 的 是 甚 麼 呢 ? 只 要 你 行 公 義 , 好 憐 憫 , 存 謙 卑 的 心 , 與 你 的   神 同 行 。
New American Standard Bible Micah 6: 7-8Does the LORD take delight in thousands of rams,
In ten thousand rivers of oil?
Shall I present my firstborn for my rebellious acts,
The fruit of my body for the sin of my soul?
He has told you, O man, what is good;
And what does the LORD require of you
But to do justice, to love kindness,
And to walk humbly with your God?






男爵府

積分: 5238

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發表於 12-2-6 21:15 |顯示全部帖子
你們倆都是基督信徒麼?那更是容易話為了,看主耶穌的臉面,何事不可以相量的呢?比我們普通人更容易了解道理些吧!祝你們有永恒的真愛!


點評

ndw  是, 我倆都是基督信徒. You are right and thank you!  發表於 12-2-9 06:04
你要身體好、記得時時要飲水、不一定等到等到口渴嘅!


洋房

積分: 55


發表於 12-2-7 23:59 |顯示全部帖子
我搵埋錢,做埋家務


子爵府

積分: 13734


發表於 12-2-9 05:13 |顯示全部帖子
本帖最後由 ndw 於 12-2-9 06:11 編輯

回覆 fungfung_hui 的帖子

辛苦了你。我知有友人的情況與你一樣。所以我能明白你每天面對的挑戰。我老公都讚那友人賢妻。願你配偶早日生性!


大宅

積分: 1192


發表於 12-2-9 17:00 |顯示全部帖子
Well..for me and I don;t really mind! Then I think it is quiet good if I can just take care BB and help her growing up! Since the job market are not so good and I am not looking for become millionair !!:;pppp:

點評

ndw  cheers!   發表於 12-2-10 11:11


大宅

積分: 3878


發表於 12-10-12 14:28 |顯示全部帖子

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