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YINGLAM


別墅

積分: 642


1#
發表於 04-10-26 14:34 |只看該作者

猶疑不

各位姊妹，

小妹已工作15年了，心身也很疲累和對目前的工作越來越沒有MOOD。真的很想休息回家湊女(她今年讀小三)及多些時間整理疏忽了的事情。過幾年後再
:wave: :wave: 我心專主為大。
私人傳訊

林太太


大宅

積分: 1058


2#
發表於 04-10-27 09:01 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

YINGLAM:
有沒有看過一本翻譯中文書(在很多基督教書室都有)英文原名是"CHOOSE TO BE AT HOME", 幾好的,也許會給妳多些clues...

做每一件事情都必定有代價,那怕是最有意義或對我們最重要的事情.我也面臨過(亦正面臨著)如妳的抉擇(雖不是同一事件),的確很難.但當衡量過實際方面的一些因素,只餘下自己的擔憂與恐懼,而又到了要踏出去的一刻,就只有憑著這個信念踏出去: 我作這事是出於一個好的動機,這也是神你看為好的事,我也已考慮到此刻我所能考慮的因素.我相信,即使我可能有錯(只是 "即使"------因我是個很要穩陣的人),也不會有任何過錯是大到神你無辦法挽回的.

願互勉...
私人傳訊

son9698


子爵府

積分: 11105


3#
發表於 04-10-27 21:53 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

Hi YINGLAM,
我的情况跟你一樣, 希望多點時間陪孩子, 在這段他們還需要我的時候親自教養他們.伴他們成長,珍惜這段美好光陰. 如你所說真的很多事情都疏忽了, 每天下班回家只得2個小時左右, 要改功課,温默書, 看學校派的圖書, 陪他們上網做練習, (他們是小一和小二生), 看通告簽回條等等...真的很忙亂, 連談話的時間都沒有!!!其實子女成長不該只得這些, 父母在子女靈育及德育上應花多点時間, 用神的話語餵養小羊啊. 我自忖現在真的做得很差.
我和你一樣, 心情忐忑不安, 有很多憂慮和害怕, 但如果因此躭誤了這段親子和教育的黄金時光真不值得啊!我也有祈禱求問神,亦有時有点看不準神的心意啊!但神把孩子交托給, 我豈能馬虎呢!憑信心, 神定會拖帶. I will keep pray to God.
基本上我已決定resign 啦, 相信３個月內會離職 , 現要跟丈夫作一些安排. 希望你有最適切的決定! Keep me post.
私人傳訊

LoveBear


複式洋房

積分: 333


4#
發表於 04-10-28 16:10 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

看了你們的分享, 很有同感呢!

我的小朋友下年也要上小學了, 想想現在每晚回家後只得2個小時左右的相處, 確實不足夠; 有時我會想對他有虧欠... :cry:

另一方面, 在教會的事奉也是如此! 每星期工作5天半, 每個星期可以脫離"工作"的只得一天半; 而這一天半要做的事可非常多: 小朋友課外活動、 我和丈夫的家人的見面、朋友、教會聚會、和弟兄姊妹團契分享...還有很多很多....像是分配不了一般...這叫我透不過氣來!

(所以我想在"事奉"上抽離, 但...又好像虧欠了 神:cry: !)

我也很懊惱呢!!!!!!!!!!

html> Lilypie Baby Days
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5#
發表於 04-10-28 16:37 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

提示: 作者被禁止或刪除 內容自動屏蔽
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Ah_Ning


複式洋房

積分: 130


6#
發表於 04-10-28 17:07 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

I have been thinking about this for almost 4 years and keep on asking GOD what should I do. At the same time, I keep on asking my husband but the answer is unwillingly yes. I understand his concern and I don't want to let him shoulder all the responsibilities. He is not a Christian and I can't tell him to trust our GOD. Now my daughter is 4 years old. My desire to be with her is growing. I am so jealous of my maid who can stay with her and play with her. I am still waiting for my GOD's great hand to put me in a suitable position or GOD is waiting for my decision?
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Monogram


子爵府

積分: 13092


7#
發表於 04-10-28 17:24 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

Hi all,
睇左你地的分享，令我回想起當初也有你地的煩惱同擔心。現在我已經做左10個月全職媽咪。作為一個全職媽咪比起返工真的辛苦很多。但每天同小朋友一同成長一同學習，見到小朋友健健康康，快快樂樂就咩辛苦都唔記得晒﹗當初我決定作為一個全職媽咪的時候，我係唔想我miss左小朋友每個成長的階段，所以就放下工作。經濟上當然不會比我也有工作時寬鬆，但天父比我地的供應每天都夠用。我地每天也學習信心的功課，更加經歷天父的保守。
當然，每個家庭的情況都唔同，但只要我地將擔憂交比我地的天父，衪自然會為我地安排。這個功課唔容易學，我每天都學緊。大家彼此勉勵代禱。祝福大家。
私人傳訊

son9698


子爵府

積分: 11105


8#
發表於 04-10-31 19:46 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

Hi Mrs Lam,

Do you know the Chinese name of the book you mentioned " choose to be at home"?
Thanks!
私人傳訊

son9698


子爵府

積分: 11105


9#
發表於 04-10-31 19:50 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

Hi Monogram,

Nice to know that you've been a full time mom for 10 months. You said "我地每天也學習信心的功課，更加經歷天父的保守。" Really hope you can share your experience to us.

How old is your kid?

Talk later.
私人傳訊

YINGLAM


別墅

積分: 642


10#
發表於 04-11-1 14:45 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

Dear all sisters,

My boss just request me trip to China for a week within this month. Sure! I'm not a business women with great ambitions.

Hear it, I don't know how to do, I loss my direction and feel it is so difficult for me.

How can I do? Why the decision come quickly. ..............

Dear God, help me to set my priorities and strengthen me to make the decision and find my direction.
:wave: :wave: 我心專主為大。
私人傳訊

gracemama123


民房

積分: 116


11#
發表於 04-11-1 22:15 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

I am fully understand the dilemma. I am also a working mom and also came across the dilemma to quit the job. However, I would like to share my experience with you. I was get promoted one year back. All of my colleagues look at my promotion is a great thing, good prospect. For my, it was really not the case. Bear more responsibilties and getting involved more office politic and senior management ugly face + need to travel. I was really collapse and stress out. I did share the situation with my hubby, hoping that he support my decision. However, he reject. Relationship was very bad at that time. Even though I prayed for GOD for so many times to change my hubby's mind. I was still struggling for sometimes. Later, GOD also changed my pray, I started to pray for patience, know how to manage my time. DON'T THINK GUILTY for the kid. I have given up the idea for changing to full time mom. My work still V.v. busy, still need to travel. However, I started to value the time with my kid. Recently, I got a chance to change a new job with higher salary + (the more important)less responsibilities. When I look back, GOD needs me to understand how to manage ourselves and our family. He knows it may not good for me to a full time mom. Of course, if you have the luxury to become a full time mom, that is good. However, if you are struggling, pls continue to focus on your job becasue this is the basic you have to support your family and your kid. If you have prayed for GOD for sometimes, don't give up, GOD know what you need< he will give you the most suitable environment and arrangement for you. Look! I am a good example.
私人傳訊

該用戶已被刪除

12#
發表於 04-11-2 15:25 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

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林太太


大宅

積分: 1058


13#
發表於 04-11-3 23:19 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

Son9698及各位:

上次那本書,我不知有否記錯書名.今天去了油麻地恩奇書室,有一本很類似 (可能上次我記錯了),書名是:

"選擇在家" (Home By Choice)
作者: 白安德. 亨特博士 (女) (Brenda Hunter, PhD)
學園出版社 ($79)

如各位逛書店見到,可看看,首先可留意最後一章(第12章)及跋.
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YINGLAM


別墅

積分: 642


14#
發表於 04-11-14 23:49 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

大家好！
最近有很多事在
:wave: :wave: 我心專主為大。
私人傳訊

bau


大宅

積分: 2476


15#
發表於 04-11-15 14:26 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

Dear All

I am a working mom also, as all of you I am very confuse on whether I should quit the job to take care my girl or keep working to earn more money to let her live better and have more chance to join different activities.

In the past, there is no doubt that I vote to remain worked and earn more money to improve the living standard. But when you see your kid is growing and learning every day, you will have hesitation on which kind of living is best to her. No doubt if you are very rich, you should quit the job and use most of your time to stay with her as she needed you so much at the time her mind is developing.

But the problem is if you quit the job now, it is really impossible to get another job when your age is over 40. The decision is very critical so it is very difficult to make.

I believe I can manage but you need to sacrifice a lot of things, I cannot buy things whenever I want, i cannot have vacation every year, I have to think very clearly before I spend every dollar and most of the important is that there will be no saving. When the kids grow up, can I support her when she wants to study oversea? If my husband is unemployed, how we sustain our living and if unluckily either one of us have sickness, can we have enough money to find a good doctor? All those questions come in my mind whenever I think about quitting the job.

My husband has no comment on this and he just asked me to think carefully before making the decision. I know he prefers to have two persons earning the money instead of relying on his own but he respects me and let me make the decision.

I am not a Catholic nor a Christian, all of my friends are working and they are surprise when they heard that I have the idea of quitting the job. But every day when you back home, you find you have only a little time to stay with your kids, you will feel sorry for her.


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3loks


禁止訪問

積分: 1871


16#
發表於 04-11-15 15:04 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

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LoveBear


複式洋房

積分: 333


17#
發表於 04-11-16 14:02 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

一段時間沒有上來, 看見多了些分享, 真喜歡這個"基督家庭"的"房間", 很warm。

而我的處境也有變了....在我上次說我想放棄工作之後, 我發現自己懷孕了....所以.....我的前景更迷惘....

我一向想放棄工作, 自己湊小朋友, 因我非常同意要珍惜與他們一起成長的日子, 但奈何..."經濟"又是一個令人非常頭痛的問題........現在有了bb...心情更加忐忑...
html> Lilypie Baby Days
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bau


大宅

積分: 2476


18#
發表於 04-11-16 14:57 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

All of us concern of the financial situation when the idea of quitting the job is come acrossing our mind.

But how much means enough? Should we have our own house, have more than 1M and have insurance surely covered all our the fee if we have sickness in the future?

Both of us realize that the most precious thing is the future of our kids and the relationship w/ them, but it is so difficult to give up something for them, do you think we are selfish?
私人傳訊

該用戶已被刪除

19#
發表於 04-11-16 15:57 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

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bau


大宅

積分: 2476


20#
發表於 04-11-16 17:05 |只看該作者

Re: 猶疑不

I am sorry that I didn't quit my job, I am still a working mom but struggle to quit the job. Opposite to you is that I don't like my job and there is no prospect for it. I have passion and I love to work but I think there will not have any development in the existing company. This maybe one cause that make me to have the idea to quit the job and you can say it is an excuse for me to escape from it or it is selfish to put my girl as an excuse.

Another different thing is that my husband knows that I can be capable to do all housework and manage to take care of my girl for I have proved to him. I am now putting my girl in my mom's house with the maid there and will only take my girl home every night, all housework is done by me and my husband won't give me any help (can't say any but rarely).

The main problem is I am very worry that in case we need money, I can't find another job if I give up the existing one, who knows what happens and if we don't have enough saving (it is very difficult to say what is enough(, I really don't have the guts to make such a big decision. Of course if such bad moments come, my husband will blame on me as well as myself too. (I think I will blame myself more than my husband).

Also, I don't know whether I can accept myself as a “See Lai” and I always asking myself that you are educated, is it worth to be a “See Lai” and why you study for so many years and comes out that you turn up to be a housewife.

I can say that my husband always respect me but if continue to work can have better living standard, he really prefers me to continue to work.

One more thing is that I am worry that when my girl goes to secondary, she doesn't need me anymore, she will has her own friends and doesn't want me to be around. At that time what things can I do? Just like the retired person to go to the welfare center to spend the time? I really don't want to be like this. I hope I can convince myself to quit the job when my girl go to primary school and overcome my worries and the most important thing is to learn to put down.
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