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少年成長

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1#
發表於 04-11-19 01:31 |只看該作者

HOW WILL YOU HANDLE THIS BEHAVIOUR

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wetfoot


複式洋房

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2#
發表於 04-11-19 17:54 |只看該作者

Re: HOW WILL YOU HANDLE THIS BEHAVIOUR

He must be your first and only son (at the moment). He has no elder brother or sister to learn (or compete) with. At this age, the child will try to challenge you in every respect. Yes, he wants to "control" you. This is because you have been trying very hard to satisfy him all time. To improve, try to lead him more to follow you (say, play some easy tricks like "it's here; it's not", when he wants to get that thing, ask him to say "thank you". If he says it; give it to him, otherwise, that thing disappeared). The purpose is to set up some "usual practice" that he should listen to you and not every time he can get what he wanted. He has to learn that there are rules. You are now on the cross road of scaling him in a range between a spoilt child and an obedient one. He stood or lay on the floor because he want to get something. Make a deal with him by asking to do something before satisfying him. At the beginning, this is hard as you are not used to do thing this way. The key to success is patience. Do not let your son win every time. For boy, the father can do better.
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5354


大宅

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3#
發表於 04-11-19 23:36 |只看該作者

Re: HOW WILL YOU HANDLE THIS BEHAVIOUR

andrew@sweetheart,
u do the right things....dont let him win when he lay down to cry~~and also...do not afraid how ppl look at u....if u lose this time...u need to use more time to teach him next time~~

yr bb can say things or not?? i think he want to do sth but dont know how to say out...my bb has the same problem~~ u can try to ask him...what u like??? point to sth and ask him~~ and also u can try to teach him baby sign to show what he want....its not only for ppl cant hear and cant speak...its also a good method to communicate with u and bb~~
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Maggie3493


大宅

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4#
發表於 04-11-19 23:55 |只看該作者

Re: HOW WILL YOU HANDLE THIS BEHAVIOUR

你可以扮走,但不要'呢埋',否則他以為你和他玩,佢會仲開心!

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kikimon


別墅

積分: 943


5#
發表於 04-11-22 00:17 |只看該作者

Re: HOW WILL YOU HANDLE THIS BEHAVIOUR

A 18-month baby has very good motor skills and want very much to experience his independence and test the limit.

In your situation, it seems that your son was angry and disappointed when you take away something from him. Even though you have a good reason to do so, he is too young to understand. When my daughter was around 18-month old, I did the same by offering her another activities or toys. When the counter-offer is attractive enough, she would easily forgot what she originally insist of. When my daughter is around 2 years old, I reduce my counter-offer distraction technique and explain to her the reasons and rules.

Personally, I think leaving the kid in public place is definitely poor action. Despite it is dangerous at public place, leaving kid alone on street seems to be a punishment to the baby when he insist to express what he want to but his mother disagreed with him. The fact is that your son is not wrong to express his wish and feeling but the method he used to express himself by sitting on the floor is wrong. Don't let people around put stress on you, keep cool and talk with your son to help him to express his feeling (especially when baby not speak to express himself). It may not work for one or two times, but keep working, be patient, your son will feel your love, understanding and support finally and become cooperative.


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6#
發表於 04-11-22 01:14 |只看該作者

Re: HOW WILL YOU HANDLE THIS BEHAVIOUR

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kikimon


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7#
發表於 04-11-23 11:57 |只看該作者

Re: HOW WILL YOU HANDLE THIS BEHAVIOUR

I am sorry I do not have any responsible maid to be introduced to you. If there is, she must be already occupied by a family unless you are lucky enough. One thing I am sure that you can make yourself become lucky is to growth up yourself and help yourself.

If you are interested in studying expert advice regarding baby's mind/behaviour and learning every tactics to raise your son, do pm me, I can told you the address of a free-of-charge US web site. I have learnt a lot from this site.


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8#
發表於 04-11-23 13:26 |只看該作者

Re: HOW WILL YOU HANDLE THIS BEHAVIOUR

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kikimon


別墅

積分: 943


9#
發表於 04-11-23 17:55 |只看該作者

Re: HOW WILL YOU HANDLE THIS BEHAVIOUR

andrew mama,

please check pm

My daugther did the same thing (playing chopsticks) when she was same age as your son. Think about what your son is feeling/thinking will make you more comfortable and keep calm. He is not doing it on purpose to make you angry.

I thought that my daughter was thinking about "how interesting, you all playing chopsticks to eat, you can play, why can't I". So at that time, I offer her choice to replace the chopsticks, likes kitty spoon or pooh bowl. I Explained to her also that chopsticks is too dangers for you and kitty spoon is much fun to play with some demonstration to distract her attention on chopsticks. Most of the times she accepted the offer and sometimes didn't. The most important point was she could experienced choosing herself and feel being respected for. That develops trust between me and my daughter bit by bit as times and many occasions passed by.


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tkma


洋房

積分: 430


10#
發表於 04-11-24 16:07 |只看該作者

Re: HOW WILL YOU HANDLE THIS BEHAVIOUR

hello,

except for this behaviour, does your son take good nap and willing to go to sleep at nite?

would he try to delay by going here and there playing even though we have dim the lights,play soft music? when would this "challenging behavior" stop, is it when getting to two is even worse (trouble two)?
tkma
Keep believing, Keep dreaming, Keep loving, keep a rainbow in your heart!!
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tkma


洋房

積分: 430


11#
發表於 04-11-24 16:22 |只看該作者

Re: HOW WILL YOU HANDLE THIS BEHAVIOUR

kikimom,

Can you please pm me also?

Thanks a lot
tkma
Keep believing, Keep dreaming, Keep loving, keep a rainbow in your heart!!
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kikimon


別墅

積分: 943


12#
發表於 04-11-26 11:09 |只看該作者

Re: HOW WILL YOU HANDLE THIS BEHAVIOUR

tkma,

please check pm. sorry for late reply, i just see the message.

My daughter did the same as your son (don't want to go to sleep)three weeks ago and now the battle was over. My maid told me that my daughter could take nap by herself within few minutes and sometimes refuse maid to accompany with her for nap. Sound like a big girl being very independent. (She go to N1 class in the morning at 9-12 and maid will go to bring her home for lunch, after lunch, she take nap at around 2pm and usually wake up at 5pm.)

However, when I go back home she stick to me and do not want to go to bed, thinking everything to play with and reasons to delay liked eye dirty, thirsty, etc. My daughter even kissed me sweetly when I scolded her not falling asleep or pretended to be angry with her. What a "terrible-two" !! I try to understand what happening and found out that she likes parents very much especially me. She was sleepy enough but did not want to loose chance to meet and play with her parents. I found that her behaviour was just simply to express her love to her parents because she does not meet parents very often as I and my husband have to go to work at daytime. She doesn't know why she must go to bed early and has no purpose to make anyone angry. I tried very hard for almost ten days to settle the battle and now so far so good. I explained to my daughter with soft tone many nights plus a little battle at two nights. Now, I got agreement with her before she go to bed and she fall asleep within 10 min. I am very happy to have it win-win situation.

Do visit the baby web I pm you. Their expert advice and analysis on baby's mind/behaviour is really good. Base on these info, I can figure out my dauther's mind and feeling more quickly to communicate closely with her. "Terrible-two" is difficult to handle because kids at this stage want to exercise autonomy and test their independence. The baby web has tips for you to deal with it.

By the way, how old is your son now ? Does her attending Nursery class or playground ?


tkma 寫道:
hello,

except for this behaviour, does your son take good nap and willing to go to sleep at nite?

would he try to delay by going here and there playing even though we have dim the lights,play soft music? when would this "challenging behavior" stop, is it when getting to two is even worse (trouble two)?
tkma


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BB頭maimimi


大宅

積分: 3344

畀面勳章


13#
發表於 04-11-26 17:02 |只看該作者

Re: HOW WILL YOU HANDLE THIS BEHAVIOUR

kikimon,

I also want to get some solution for the my son of age 20 months old, would you please pm the web-site for me?
私人傳訊

tkma


洋房

積分: 430


14#
發表於 04-11-29 00:05 |只看該作者

Re: HOW WILL YOU HANDLE THIS BEHAVIOUR

kikimon, received your pm lar..thanks!

tonite is too late, probably would go to the website later to see..

my son is 19 months old and i feel like he is getting to the "trouble two" since last month!

My son would urge me/my hubby to read books to him in order to delay his time to sleep. each time we say only read one book, he would take a book ask us to read and then go to his "library" and take another book and ask us to read. This keeps going on until 14 to 15 books...and we often see that he is very tired, yawning...and yet he refuses to sleep...

Probably you are right, he loves us and wants to stay with us longer.....

might be i need more patience.. probably he is still to young..........


tkma :-P
Keep believing, Keep dreaming, Keep loving, keep a rainbow in your heart!!
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Belinda


複式洋房

積分: 434


15#
發表於 04-12-8 13:15 |只看該作者

Re: HOW WILL YOU HANDLE THIS BEHAVIOUR

Dear andrew ma ma,

You may visit this site, it has lost of advice from expert. I received weekly and monthly email from this site regarding the development (mental & physical) of my son after I registered as a member.
www.babycenter.com

Also, there are books you can read.
1. How to behave so your preschooler will, too
(I order this from www.yesasia.com)
2. 我的一歲孩子 - 信誼基金出版社
(It's in a series until age of 7)

I have learnt a lot from these books.
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