My best friend's situation is almost same as yours ...
She is waiting for the miracle to come. This is the only thing that you two can do now. No right or wrong in love ...
I understand that this hope will give you energy to live better and drive you away from the boring live. Not wrong to keep this fantacy as long as you do the right things to your kid!
One day you will wake up to face the reality ... maybe when you're getting old ... ! Good luck!