You message really socks me, as the husband is just a human, can you at least understand that he would be disturbed by many daily events?
Many people are not working like 穿膠花, for which one can forget about the work immediately after the working hours. Human brain is not designed to switch thoughts immediately, if one is very involving in some mental work, the idea will just hang on.
I hate to say but your tone really make me think you expect a perfect husband: do he own work, bring home money, be good father, good to family AND don't show any emotion. JUST Bring Home MONEY!!!!
Regarding "別那麼粗心對BB", there can be many interpertation, his standard might not be just like the wife. They should talk over it but please don't just blame the husband - many wives like to exaggerate the importance of BB while fail completely to note about the status of the husband
And you sound like you expect a perfect wife who would take care of the family and the feelings of everyone in it no matter how hard she works and how much efforts she has to spend at home, as well as a perfect BB who would only smile and be good whenever daddy comes home, however unreasonably he behaves.
Firstly, for this case, the husband just recently behave like that, and smartlinus also commented that he's over-work lately. So I would say this is a hard time for her husband and I think supporting him would be much fruitful rather than complaining.
From time to time, everybody would have some hard time. Being a family, it is important for one to support each other. Put a 'irresposible' stamp on the husband help nothing.
Secondly, I detest the assumption that man should be 'unbreakable' under stress. I don't think anyone would like to bring stress from work to home, but it IS a fact, a sad fact.
Totally agree that men are not "unbreakable". But believe that bringing stress home and letting it affect your family lives equal very low "EQ". And it is a fact that millions/billions of adults, men and women, have enough EQ to separate home from work.
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我覺得老公粗心到好討人厭 
又唔諗吓個仔對佢幾冇信心 
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