少年成長 今日: 0 | 主題: 16033

積分: 2807

1^#

發表於 07-9-19 19:55 |只看該作者 |正序瀏覽 |打印

我有兩個小朋友，大女4歲，細仔1歲。自從細仔出世後，我嘗試盡量分些時間與大女獨處，但是細仔始終需要照顧的，而且親戚朋友一見到我們，必定會說個BB好可愛之類的話...

細仔是個很好湊的BB，家姐以前會無事喊三場...個個喜歡細仔不是沒有原因的...但是這樣比較，對兩個小朋友都不公平呀...

大女漸漸顯出妒忌的行為哩...我開始擔心...

如何令手足和睦相處，真是大學問。

:-|

0 0 0

laughin' to keep from cryin'

私人傳訊

積分: 2807

29^#

發表於 07-10-22 19:38 |只看該作者

昨日終於與家姐講，如果佢唔錫細佬，細佬就唔同佢玩啦。佢聽完態度有明顯轉變。

不知道我是否太樂觀了，我總覺得如果家姐有機會教細佬的話(例如寫字、砌積木)，兩人關係應該可以改善囉。

laughin' to keep from cryin'

私人傳訊

積分: 1136

28^#

發表於 07-10-19 03:12 |只看該作者

if they dont share toys together, then set a limit of time of each kids. It is fair and stop all argument, but ultimately it is better for them to learn sharing.

原文章由 my1215sui 於 07-10-18 04:53 PM 發表
現在佢地一爭玩具就頭痛呀....有時我都會望下佢地點樣處理先,如果邊個太過份我先會出聲,因為我費時次次佢地嘈或者爭玩具都要大人出馬.....

唉........真係煩 ...

私人傳訊

my1215sui

男爵府

積分: 6328

27^#

發表於 07-10-18 16:53 |只看該作者

現在佢地一爭玩具就頭痛呀....有時我都會望下佢地點樣處理先,如果邊個太過份我先會出聲,因為我費時次次佢地嘈或者爭玩具都要大人出馬.....

唉........真係煩

私人傳訊

積分: 1136

26^#

發表於 07-10-13 01:00 |只看該作者

wawamama,

From day 1 of my pregnancy, I told my daughter that she will have a best friend coming to live with us and from time to time, she believes that the younger brother is her best friend in life. Now she will kiss him every morning before she went to school and every parent saw it, they will says it is so sweet!

Going back to your story, if your daughter cannot answer your questions, it means that she feel guilty and it is time for you to correct her. Give her the situation that let play together and both will be happy. I always ask my daughter how she likes to be treated and she will understand why she needs to share. Or you creat the situation that the younger one got the toys and ask her how she feels. It works for my daughter all time!

Now my daughter is going to turn 5yrs this month and she acts like a peace keeper in the house. When I have arguement with daddy, she will either tell daddy to apologise or ask me why I am upset about daddy. She is so innocent and she seems understand why the arguement start and decide to stand on one side only. I am so glad that she is my daughter and whenever I ask her whom she loves most, the answer is always "FAMILY" because she loves us as a family, not a single person.

原文章由 wawamama 於 07-10-11 07:12 PM 發表

Xother your are absolutely right! Sometimes I feel my daughter can actually read my mind!

I tried to reason with her yesterday. Her Dad bought a nice toy and both kids soon started fighting. My ...

私人傳訊

積分: 2807

25^#

發表於 07-10-11 19:12 |只看該作者

原文章由 xother 於 07-10-11 00:54 發表
Wawamama,
If you think like that, then it is easier for your daughter to think the same way. First you need to change the way you think, then you can correct your daughter!

For me, I always praise my ...

Xother your are absolutely right! Sometimes I feel my daughter can actually read my mind!

I tried to reason with her yesterday. Her Dad bought a nice toy and both kids soon started fighting. My daughter, being the stronger one, got it and ran to her room. I asked her (in my normal voice) whether she felt good about it, she said yes. I asked her whether her brother felt good about it, she said no. Then I asked her whether she was happy that her brother cried...she did not answer me...

I need to think about this...

laughin' to keep from cryin'

私人傳訊

積分: 1136

24^#

發表於 07-10-11 00:54 |只看該作者

Wawamama,
If you think like that, then it is easier for your daughter to think the same way. First you need to change the way you think, then you can correct your daughter!

For me, I always praise my daughter as she is beautiful and smart. For the baby, as he is small, it is natural for anyone to say he is cute and I will say to my daughter that she also received all these compliments when she was a baby, so no need to get jealous.

For my case, my daughter also think the baby is cute and I never see any jealousy from her in terms of getting compliments from strangers.

原文章由 wawamama 於 07-10-10 07:34 PM 發表
At the beginning it was OK. My daughter was very excited when the baby arrived.

I think my problem is, although I know it's impossible to be absolutely fair, and that I should treat each child as a ...

私人傳訊

積分: 2807

23^#

發表於 07-10-10 19:34 |只看該作者

At the beginning it was OK. My daughter was very excited when the baby arrived.

I think my problem is, although I know it's impossible to be absolutely fair, and that I should treat each child as a unique person, I cannot stop other people being nice to the baby - and to the baby only. I have been trying to "keep balance" by turning my attention to my daughter whenever such things happen, but somehow such measure makes things worse. I think she may now have a vague idea that I feel sorry for her, and she may even feel that she should feel sorry for herself.

What should I do when people are being nice to the baby? No matter what I do, I feel it's wrong.:-|

laughin' to keep from cryin'

私人傳訊

Oscarmom

別墅

積分: 744

22^#

發表於 07-10-4 23:51 |只看該作者

Usually is my elder son dont want to share the toys with his brother, sometimes when my younger son playing the toys and the big one goes to take his toys then usually he will cry never hit his big brother, only if the big one playing the toys and the small one wants to take his toys then the big one will hit him and say no to him then the small one will cry again! I can see that the small one is much better than the big one, sometimes if the small one playing the toys if his brother or friends wants to play he will share with them or give the toys to them.:lol:

原文章由 estherchong 於 07-10-3 22:39 發表

想請教你兩個仔會否打架﹖ 我全職湊兩個﹐ 都係 3 歲和 1 歲半。大約半年前﹐ 大成日蝦細。到左最近﹐ 發現大蝦細時 ﹐ 細會發老皮反抗 ﹐ 變成打交無時停。我已經成 ...

私人傳訊

850212

禁止訪問

積分: 6156

21^#

發表於 07-10-4 02:10 |只看該作者

提示: 作者被禁止或刪除內容自動屏蔽

私人傳訊

積分: 1136

20^#

發表於 07-10-4 00:31 |只看該作者

I have 2 children, daughter is going to turn 5 this month and son is 3months old. I taught my daughter about how she wants to be treated in order for her to understand. eg, I heard her saying bad words, I ask if she like someone say it to her, then she will say NO and she will learn what to say and what NOT to say.
So far she loves her younger brother very much and she loves to kiss him all time. She is a good helper as she likes to sing, read story and play with him. She even tell him not to cry as mommy is cooking dinner. Sometimes she may shake him too hard and I explained to her that baby is small and it can pain him. I always said to her that he is her friends and he can play with her very soon, because of that, my daughter keep asking me if he can grow faster?
I am not sure if I am lucky or my way of teaching works, but my daughter never show any jealous about the younger brother. In fact, she only upset when she cannot calm down the baby cry! She feels that the younger brother doesnt like her? It is funny to see both of them looking at each other and laugh.

私人傳訊

estherchong

洋房

積分: 52

19^#

發表於 07-10-3 22:39 |只看該作者

原文章由 Oscarmom 於 07-9-19 23:33 發表
I also have 2 sons, 3 years old and 1.5 years old. My elder son go for whole day school 9-3:30pm, usually i will bring my younger son to the park after his brother go to school and spend some time wit ...

想請教你兩個仔會否打架﹖ 我全職湊兩個﹐ 都係 3 歲和 1 歲半。大約半年前﹐ 大成日蝦細。到左最近﹐ 發現大蝦細時 ﹐ 細會發老皮反抗 ﹐ 變成打交無時停。我已經成日同大講﹐ 唔好蝦細 ﹐要讓下細... 但教極佢都唔聽﹐ 重話 no no no﹐ 攪到我日日都好忟﹐ 好疲倦。你有無依個問題呀﹖ 解決到嗎﹖ thanks﹗

私人傳訊

clintonma

別墅

積分: 652

18^#

發表於 07-10-3 11:18 |只看該作者

我大仔3歲而家陀緊3個月, 自知道有BB後仔仔好痴身, 成日好似樹熊咁又退化扮BB... 遲D個肚大D抱唔到實煩死

私人傳訊

積分: 2807

17^#

發表於 07-10-2 19:22 |只看該作者

覺得家姐要讓細佬是即時冒出來的想法，不過最後沒有跟著這個想法處理，因為我覺得讓也好不讓也好，應該出於家姐自己的意願而不是因為媽媽下了什麼命令。

或者因為細仔實在是個太可愛的BB，所以潛意識不希望他長大...(說到這裡居然有點傷感)...唉...我也知道為他好就不應慣壞他...

:-|

laughin' to keep from cryin'

私人傳訊

coey128

男爵府

積分: 6432

16^#

發表於 07-9-30 13:48 |只看該作者

原文章由 my1215sui 於 07-9-30 12:30 發表
大家好,我都係有兩個小朋友,大仔兩歲七個月,細女十四個月,佢地現在成日都會爭玩具,其實哥哥真係幾錫妹妹呀,有時佢真係會讓,又時妹妹喊又問下你仲咩事呀,哥哥鍚番你啦......但有時就一定要搶到樣野為止,而妹妹都好惡 ...

你兩個BB年齡仲近過我...我小B出世時囡囡先兩歲....而家我都好擔心佢O地O既相處...

因為囡囡而家成日同佢堂細佬打交...應該又係成O左爭寵啦...一發脾氣就咬佢........同埋好認叻,只要大人講一句,佢做唔到就即刻去做,我唸佢係好想表現自己...

話俾囡囡聽,佢有D野做得唔O岩...佢就好似唔識聽咁,講完就走...
試過打佢手手1,佢又對住你笑...........搞到我真係唔識點教佢...
<<囡囡而家20個月啦>>

私人傳訊

my1215sui

男爵府

積分: 6328

15^#

發表於 07-9-30 12:30 |只看該作者

大家好,我都係有兩個小朋友,大仔兩歲七個月,細女十四個月,佢地現在成日都會爭玩具,其實哥哥真係幾錫妹妹呀,有時佢真係會讓,又時妹妹喊又問下你仲咩事呀,哥哥鍚番你啦......但有時就一定要搶到樣野為止,而妹妹都好惡呀....但我就一定吾會次次都要哥哥讓,因為咁樣對哥哥好吾公平,我會睇下邊個搶人先,令佢地知道媽咪冇偏心,邊個吾乖就要罰,好在這個方式暫時都OK.....可能我個小朋友都比較細膽....惡少少佢地就好驚呀,跟本都吾洗體罰.....

私人傳訊

traeh

伯爵府

積分: 19814

2025勳章 2025勳章蛇年勳章 2024年龍年勳章虎到金來勳章牛年勳章好媽媽勳章醒目開學勳章環保接龍勳章

14^#

發表於 07-9-29 18:33 |只看該作者

你今次做得好好呀

不過, 點解一開始你覺得家姐要讓細佬呀??-( 你試下想想, 如果你係家姐, 如果次次都要大讓細, 都會好嬲, 覺得媽媽偏心,

既然係家姐拿到的, 就要畀選擇權家姐, 家姐真係唔肯畀, 細佬喊, 唯有同細佬講道理－[ 我知你好唔開心, 不過呢個係家姐的汽球, 你唔可以夾硬來, 喊都係無用架.]之類.

細個可能佢唔係太明, 或者唔想明, 只想喊, 想靠喊得手, 但係講多幾次, 佢漸漸會明白要講道理. 咁兩個就無咁多野爭.

識得一個媽媽, 佢教無論大定細, 想要對方手上東西時, 必須先搵一件東西交換, 仲要睇對係咪有興趣同你換. 佢地有咁習慣, 父母就無咁煩啦.

另外, 盛讚家姐係前所未見咁好的家姐, 我估佢有滿足感同優越感, 就會更加想做個好家姐.

原文章由 wawamama 於 07-9-27 13:27 發表
昨日帶了女同仔在商場逛街，正好有送氣球的活動，家姐拿到最後一個氣球，細佬見到又想玩，但家姐唔肯，細佬於是放聲大哭。

我本來第一個反應是要家姐讓俾細佬玩，但是我又想，兩姐弟始終要學習如何相處，於是我心平氣和地同家姐講:
...

私人傳訊

jk923

翡翠宮

積分: 75310

13^#

發表於 07-9-27 15:21 |只看該作者

原文章由 wawamama 於 07-9-27 13:27 發表
昨日帶了女同仔在商場逛街，正好有送氣球的活動，家姐拿到最後一個氣球，細佬見到又想玩，但家姐唔肯，細佬於是放聲大哭。

我本來第一個反應是要家姐讓俾細佬玩，但是我又想，兩姐弟始終要學習如何相處，於是我心平氣和地同家姐講:
...

聽到好感動呀！
唔好話小朋友丫，大人有時都會有自私的一面；而且佢地重係小朋友，教導佢地既學問真係有排學呀！
好似尋日咁帶佢地兩個去行Aprita，去到玩具部有張Lego台，咁有4個位，有兩個小朋友同我對仔女係度玩，我個仔剛小一，細女2歲4個月，有個小朋友係度扭計話要玩，咁我個仔居然起身比佢，呢個情況我地緊係勁讚佢啦！細女玩玩下比人拎晒dLego！

咁佢居然識得同人講'可唔可以惜呢個比我呀？'同台d 父母唔惜都唔好意思啦！我都將呢d功勞比哥哥，話佢知因為佢係妹妹既好榜樣，所以妹妹都好有禮貌，所以哥哥都好錫妹妹。需然有時都會投訴。

私人傳訊