Smilewa, you know what when I met my husband at my office's downstair. I crie like a child. I really don't want to go washroom, everytime I see the blood, I know they are not here any more. After this IVF, I think the most critical reason that I failed is I was too tired everyday after I back to the office, at the beginning I have some symtoms were totally disappeared, I knew that's not good signs. I think I overestimated my health tolerance. I remember I walked from causeway bay to wanchai to met my hummy, I feel very tired, also, many many activities to meet my friends. Because I stayed at home for the whole week is too boring to me. Once I back to office, everything become uncontrollable.
Today, I want to see the chinese doctor, she said my health is not good & not easy to "著床", also, we know too much able IVF & think too much, that affect the result as well.
She suggest me to take at least one month rest & try again. But I think I will take at least two months.
Anyway, we are together. Smilewa, you are not lonely, I will support you all the time, I think we already become a good friend.
Just forget all the unhappiness & we start again. IVF road is really tough, without all your support, I think I will not that strong.
Yes, I totally agreed that as we're already become friend....friend just like we can thoroughly understand what they're thinking of & trust with each other.
Like me, since my husband need to have a dinner gathering with his friends (as confirmed for so long), so I tell him I won't go out to see his friends as I may not feel comfortable to enjoy the gathering....like they'll drink wine but I can't drink it.
In fact, I want to take a walk for shopping & eating. But I really don't have this energy for shopping...even don't want to walk alone. So I take bus and directly go to my home. Bought some vegetables and congee for my dinner. Afterwards, I eat my favorite ice-cream already & have some coughing medicine (as I've coughing during these two weeks but I insist don't want to take any medicine during the course), so now I'm freely to eat/drink.
I just observe I've some brown color coming & guess it should be M M coming. So radiculous & concidence that visit doctor today morning, no M M come but after get the result, my M almost coming at night time.
My husband said he doesn't want me to take chinese medicine for this month in order to have a rest for all things. Maybe it's right as I've tried for so much chinese medicine b/4.
Right now, only myself at home but I still can't cry out....I ask myself why why ....why you cannot release out .....my patience is terrible which I cannot imagine I should be like that.
I've a dream that if one day we can bingo, we need to face to face for meeting...being friend & continue keep to building our relationship to support each other. Of course, no matter we can meet or not, I'm truly believe I say 100% words to you & sisters in this topic.
Somehow I scare to see this topic again, but now I told myself....I'm not scare because I need to face my failure & get more strong for the next IVF. I know there're still of sisters like us who don't have any experiences or knowledge of IVF.
I need to support & sharing with them no matter I can bingo or not. I like to help others & makes me more comfortable. Build up a more positive thinking for myself.
I'll do that, so can you. We need to give for our effort in this IVF. We can do much more for next stage.
Take good of yourself again (don't think I'm long air),
smilewa
Really thankful for your continuous encouragement as we've the same experiences on IVF. Yes, you're right that we don't need to give up, as we give up, that means my BB is also give up with us.
So let me have some sunshine in this weekend, hope come back is a lady with sunshine & positive in front of you. I'll try.
lanittp, after I saw your message, I found you are very strong & positive. Compare with all sisters here, my painfulness is really nothing, in fact, I already reach an unacceptable level. But I told to myself, if I think negative/positive, my life will become totally different. If I think negatively, I might not want to face this problem,psychologically become problematic, that might affect my whole life in the future. If I think positively, I might still have chance to win this battle, as lanittp said, even 1% chance I should keep trying & don't give up.
If we don't put effort today, we will regret in the future.
Smilewa, I think your painfulness will more than me double, that's why my mind just keep thinking & hoping you can Bingo. You already suffer a lot in the infertility road. As other sisters in here, u give me incredibly strong support. If you are willing, I can go out for a drink or dinner anytime. Let's release our unhappiness together :)
Actually, I think Government give us too little support for our infertility group, we need to pay a lot of money even can't tax free. My mind just thinking to create a non-profit orgainzation to fight for our benifits. E.g. Increase the resources for us, Faster the queue up time for public IVF waiting time, tax reduction, giving letter to Gov't to care about us....
If more sisters supporting me, we can create an initial community to see what we can do next step. The IVF road is too hard to walk, we shouldn't suffer by ourselves, we paid a lot of money for tax but always can't get the benefits for the Gov't. Even the China Pregancy Mother can get our benefits but not us. We should stand up & fight for our benefits. I know it is very hard to us to face the society, that's why we can't get any benefits on it.
Smilewa,meimei223
It was with profound shock that I learnt about your case from the BK this morning.I know how you must feel .Anyway,be brave and strong for us and your family.I hope you get better soon.And I will praying for your speedy recovery.Success or failure is a part of life and should be taken in stride.This may be a good opportunity for you to take a rest.Since efforts always bring reward,so continue trying.Get and soon.Keep your spirits up.Take good care of yourself.Don't lose your fighting spirit.May God grant you your well-deserved success next time.
I am rarely to speak but after reading all your messages, just feel that you all are so supportive & give lots of support to other sisiters who go throught this difficult IVF journey.
I am just miscarriage after my 2nd IVF and resting at home. When I went to hospital to have 人工流產, it was so embarassing to see several young ladies don't want to have their baby and do
人工流產 also. I am just asking God are they making jokes on us...but then I must respect God has her own planning on us. She is testing us...
Just keep the faith & do our best then we have no regret. Just want to say to all IVF sisters, you are not alone & we all are together. We should proud of how brave we are to chase our wishes..
BBHappy, I am sorry to hear your miscarriage, It would be very painful to you & your husband. Hope you can take more rest & recover very soon for the next battle. You already walk one step further than me :), that means you have a proper environment to let your baby 著床, right?
Did u talk with your dr. what problem causes your miscarriage & how to avoid it next time?
I understand why these young girls do the 人工流產, because they are in different stages with us. When I was young I also don't want to have baby. I always said if God don't give baby to that group of women would be a garceful gift from God. No painful & no responsibilities.
As I getting older & older, I started to change my mind dramatically, my husband know I don't like baby, he created an online forum "bbrocket" to let me have many opportunities to meet little children. I found they are very cute & naive. This year we start planning to have a baby. Finally, I know something can't control & can't on our own schedule. It must fit God's willingness. Before, I planned to accomplish many of my own goals, education, career...
I already give up the career opportunities & staying in my exisiting co. in order to concentrate on baby planning. Now, I seems keep wasting time for both.
I am the person only can focus on one thing. I need to finish one by one. But if I can't earn more money, how can I support my further baby planning.
Sometimes people really contradictive
Pauljoey, thanks for your keep going on supports. I am thinking to see your chinese doctor, but that is too far away from my home. Is he really good? Or any other chi. doctors HK island side?
From this failure, I will try more different methods. e.g. Chi medicine, acupunture. I only have two set of embryos to put. My pressure is getting bigger & bigger. Thus, I will try any methods that is feasible.
If any sisters have any good methods, please let me know, I really want to put all my efforts this time & having my own baby
PoPo0509, good to hear your coming. Besides my baby planning, I am going to find some information or gov't funding on it. See anything we can do on it, I think we are some active women, I think we can do something for the society & ourselves.
Meimei223,
Dr said possibly is the quality of fertilized egg is not so good so they don't further develop. He said it is very common nowaday and approx 20% of pregnancy end up with miscarriage. Nothing could do right now but I am consulting Chinese doctor hope can have better recovery & preparation for next round.
You are right about those young girls, they are just in different stage.
I have very similar situation with you on career. Have stucked in this company for several years as I want to concentrate to have BB. But now consider to change job as don't want to wasting time anymore. I hope can accomplish both.
Lanittp, about 針炙 sounds really interesting to me. You mean I can try HKBaptist hospital's 針灸科?Which dr are u using right now? 潘兆薇中醫師? I saw her resume is specialist on 男女不育不孕.
Thanks for your helping & suggestion! I might call them tomorrow & see what they can help me, again, many thanks for your care & encouragment. I believe we can over come all difficulties & having our babies finally. Sisters, Don't give up !
I've read thru all your msgs, I was so touched, as if I was standing right beside you. I havent yet started anything yet coz my first consultation will be 31/10 in PWH, therefore I dont quite understand some of the abbreviations that you're using. I really hope to hear some good news from you gals on your next try.....be honest u girls are so brave....coz whenever I have to visit Dr. about any form of pregnant related stuff my heart beat as if there's a whole world can hear it... and that invisible pressure it's very heavy.
Never did imagine getting pregnant is that difficult, my tears just wont help running out when I first heard that my tubes are totally blocked!
Dont know y but from that day onwards, seems like I always felt like crying, when I read or talk about pregnancy - so感性.
I will be skipping the IUI part and jump straight to test tube bb (is this IVF?) ..... all sisters here are 'extremely' supportive. I've learnt a lot here and got tonnes of encouragement. :lol: :lol:
I've noticed most of the sisters here visited Dr. Tay, which hospital is he in? And can we pick Dr.?
HappyCC, if you have tubal problem(same as me), u only can do IVF, u can say IVF is meaning test tube baby, but more professioal term.
Other terms such as ER,ET. Meaning is ER (Egg retreival) - the process of extract the eggs form your body. ET(Embryos Transfer) - the process of put back the embryos back to your body. If you still have any terms you don't understand, just ask us, before I also don't know any of it, just guess & learnt from the message or other sisters. You are Junior in here, just ask whatever you want to know :)
In fact, I am not as strong as you think. I cried many many times & want to die as I found I am not able to pregnancy spontaneously. Just I have no other choice, IVF is the only way we can reach our goal. After I learnt I still have chance. I no longer upsat & start finding out the solution. I remember my friend she said "Money can sloved problem is not a problem", then I understood that we can use $$ to try to slove it, we still have chance. Many illness that is really unable to use $$$ to heal it, e.g. Cancer.
Therefore, don't put the happiness KEY to others, you should keep it by yourself, always make yourself happy to pass everyday. Of course, we are human & will have very upsat time. But don't stay there too long time, if not, you will not be recover & getting worst & worst.
For dr. Tay, he only use HKSH, the most expensive hospital I think, we have no choice. But if you go to HKSH, they also have a list of dr. to choose, but not include Dr.Tay. Don't worry, he is very good Dr. Even my husband seems disagree me due to my unsucess of this IVF, but I think he already did very good from his part, just I treat the babies not good enough, I will learn from error & try it again.
Sorry to hear your news. I have not gone thro' all the messages. Are you going to take a rest before starting another ET cycle? Take Care. Be brave and strong.
In fact, I am the direct client of HKSH. Seems you are not allowed to select doctor. It depends on which day you go to the hospital.
Monday - Dr. Doo
Tuesday - Dr. Philip Ho
Wednesday - Dr. Clement Leung
Thursday - Dr. Jenny Ng
Friday - Dr. Milton Leong
Saturday - Dr. William So
Sunday - one of the above dr. who is on duty that week
My last ER was scheduled on Sunday. Dr. Clement Leung was the duty doctor. So far, I only went thro' the ER. My ET was postponed due to abdominal fluid accumultion for which I have told you before.
Oh yes, wish2006, if you are the direct clients of HKSH, u can't select the dr.
Before I thought I will take at least 2 mths' rest. But according to my age (end of 34 already), I decided to do it asap. If coming ET failed (touch wood), I still hve time to retrieve better quality eggs & do it again the whole process. If my health is allowed, I think I don't want to waste the time.
Another things that make me very upsat is after my period came, the 2nd day, suddently my abdomin feel very painful & flew out something like the cell. Totally two cells were come out. The color is white & the shape just like the embryos. The size is smilar as our thumb. After that, I didn't feel pain anymore. I believed they are embryos, I took the photo & let my husband to see. He also think they are embryos. That increment my painfulness, it means they already growth to certain size & might due to my body was too tired everyday & made them died. It became more guilt to myself. Like killing my babies by not taking care too much about the body. I was too relax & seems nothing after one week's rest at home.
for our effort in this IVF. We can do much more for next stage.
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