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Baby Kingdom - 親子王國香港討論區 › 首頁 › 夫婦情感› What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushan ...

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樓主: chuchuma

What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case [複製鏈接]

123

Sanho

洋房

積分: 403

21^#

發表於 05-5-17 21:52 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

其實你可以搵到咁多證據, 我懷疑係咪你老公專登俾你知.

私人傳訊

魚生

禁止訪問

積分: 35771

好媽媽勳章畀面勳章

22^#

發表於 05-5-17 22:04 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

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是是但但

水晶宮

積分: 62242

2025勳章 2025勳章蛇年勳章牛年勳章 2018復活節勳章

23^#

發表於 05-5-17 23:07 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

但佢都好過份o者! 在出面玩都唔夠,仲要問太太借錢去玩?!

chuchuma,
完整家庭,真係唔一定有丈夫才完整的。佢成日出trip,又夜返,有佢同冇佢都好似冇咩分別。當然,每個人都想有幸福家庭,一家三口樂也融融,但是現在是他一手破壞,並不是你! 我老公個家姐一樣係離佐婚,但我一樣見到佢同d小朋友生活得好好,可能初時是要一段時間適應,但是總好過對著一個不忠既丈夫,再要在孩子面前扮快樂吧~

chuchuma 寫道:
as he is now running his own business, he has no contribution on the home finance, in addition, he always (especially these few months) borrow the money from me and told me that he would return to me, but of course, nil return.

Childhood is journey, not a race.

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Natmama

別墅

積分: 709

24^#

發表於 05-5-18 03:54 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

chuchuma,

From your words, I'm sure you have enough evidence on what's going on. One thing is if you get a divorce now, you will probably not get any alimony or child support from him becuz he does not have a stable income. My parents were divorced when I was 3 and honestly it really didn't have much impact on me. I was taken care of by my grandmother since birth so everything remained the same after the divorce. Who is taking care of your child now, if it's your parents, then the impact should not be too strong. Being a working woman, I know it's hard to deal with a cheating husband especially since you are the financial support at home. But like the Chinese says, "rather teach people to hit son, don't teach people to divorce"...is there any way you can work it out? Don't get mad at me but do you think becuz you are so busy focusing on work and home affairs, you have neglected your husband. You know men are just little kids at heart and they need lots of attention. Sorry, I'm just giving me opinion. Good luck.

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chuchuma

大宅

積分: 1915

25^#

發表於 05-5-18 12:35 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

Thank you for all your info and advices.

Natmama,

I have employed a maid to take care of my son at home. You're right, I have to admit that I put lots of my effort on my work (since I am quite career mind and now I am the major financial support) and most of my effort and attention on BB. However, what I am doing is for the good sake for BB and us in the future. He should understand my points and try to assist me and release my burden. Beforehand, he was actively involved in taking care of BB and the home affairs. But since last winter, I found him change his attitude significantly and tried to escape from something else. While he was at home, he just stay in the bedroom facing the computer and rare to spend time with BB or home affairs until he was asked to do so.
If we get divorced, I am only concern about the psychological development of my son as he may not see his dad everyday. Luckily, my son is quite close to me and the maid.

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Sanho

洋房

積分: 403

26^#

發表於 05-5-18 14:00 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

其實聽你咁講, 佢之前都努力過. 你即管同佢傾下先, 睇佢點講. 唔使一野就講到離婚. 但你已做最壞打算當然係最明智.

不過我覺得你好似對佢無乜留戀/感情? 因為從冇見你話唔捨得佢, 仲好愛佢之類?

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ringoivy

翡翠宮

積分: 76971

27^#

發表於 05-5-18 14:12 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

當一個人心淡時真係講咩都無用的. chuchuma無論你個結論如何我都會支持你的

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chuchuma

大宅

積分: 1915

28^#

發表於 05-5-18 15:05 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

Of course I love my hushand that's why I married him, we date for more than 10 years before get marriage. However, once I found the condoms in his brief case, I totally lost my confidence and trust on him. I really can't stand for it. Be honest, in these days, I am still thinking how to settle the case in stead of getting a divorce. However, I understand my hushand very well, he will not say sorry and admit anything, to the worst case, he preferred keep silence. So what can I do ?

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Sanho

洋房

積分: 403

29^#

發表於 05-5-18 15:54 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

如果係咁可以暫時分開住先，因為如果即刻雙方同意簽字離婚，好快可以搞掂．但如果唔係咁肯定，或仲想大家諗清楚，可以先分居，再睇下點．

不過分左居再係番埋一齊既機會唔大，一來你都適應左，根本冇佢都得，二來佢出左去，可能玩得更勁，除非佢忽然發現原來唔可以冇左你，做番好多野修補關係．

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毛毛虫

別墅

積分: 710

30^#

發表於 05-5-18 17:44 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

你點都要同佢講清楚, 如果唔係你會更加辛苦. 講出黎睇下大家下一步想點樣囉

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Planet

禁止發言

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31^#

發表於 05-5-18 21:09 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

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浩天靚媽

禁止訪問

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32^#

發表於 05-5-18 21:50 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

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chuchuma

大宅

積分: 1915

33^#

發表於 05-5-18 23:17 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

He was born in mid of Jan - Capricorn ?

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Natmama

別墅

積分: 709

34^#

發表於 05-5-19 00:53 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

chuchuma,

Think of the effect it will have on yourself first before thinking of your son. If you are not happy, the baby will not be happy either. If you do separate from your husband, how much will it affect you emotionally. If possible, run the idea over with your parents. With their support, it will be a lot easier on you. I've also been with my husband for 10 years before getting married and I definitely will not tolerate a third person in the relationship. Once you're ready, confront your husband with your evidence and see if he shows any regrets. Do you have any idea who the third person is? He might not be taking her seriously...maybe just fool around

Remember, you have the upper hand because majority of men DO NOT want a divorce....so use this to your benefit.

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xellos

大宅

積分: 1587

35^#

發表於 05-5-19 10:01 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

Hi chuchuma,

見你所形容,他們應仍在"熱戀期"~什麼都看不清的時期,
如果你要與他三口六面說清楚時,用詞和理句上都要非常小心,
雖然你可以理直氣壯去說他的不時,但以這個時期的人什麼都不會聽取,只會偏袒那邊去,所以要小心

也應為自己的新生活安排好條後路

讀書只係人生一部份,
孩子有良好心理質數, 才可勇往直前。

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mcmug

伯爵府

積分: 17146

36^#

發表於 05-5-19 10:33 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

chuchuma,

其實你都未清楚你先生係"去滾" or "包二奶" or "婚外情", 雖然三樣都係無法令人接受, 但我相信處理既方法會有所不同~
如果你先生仲愛你同呢個家, 頭兩個情況比較易 handle, 問題係你 husband 肯唔肯認錯, 改過, 而你又會唔會再相信佢? 比機會佢? 第三個情況大家都知比較難搞, 要睇實際情況, 又會睇佢地感情去到邊!
但你要記住, 你地有既係十幾年感情基礎, 其實男人同小朋友一樣要人關心! 一來小朋友出世屋企變化大, 大家都要時間接受; 二來你又大部份時間要做野, 雖然係為屋企, 但都疏忽左照顧你先生既感受, 一定係把佢排到最尾! 你又要諗下佢當初都好努力為個家~你睇下家陣做"老婆大人"就明啦! 第三佢初初自己做生意應該都遇到好多問題, 想人支持同關心, 如果屋企得唔到, 佢又唔識諗咪出左去搵人支持囉!
學老人家話齋, 一個銅鑼敲唔響, 一定相方都有責任, 唔會話一個人岩晒~

我都係半個單親家庭長大, 千其唔好話單親家庭長大好慘, 好似我咁, 老豆爛滾, 媽咪又唔甘心離婚, 廿年黎成日家嘈屋閉, 離離合合仲更加令小朋友唔開心! 因為最尾一定會用個小朋友做磨心, 所以我由細到大都唔鍾意返屋企, 因為係婆婆湊, 情願放假跟呀姨去街!
即使離左婚父母都要盡自己既責任, 始終係自己既親兒!
你要知道所有事都可以打算, 包括你自己同小朋友以後既生活, 只有感情係冇得打算, 唯有見步行步~

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sylviawong

男爵府

積分: 5339

37^#

發表於 05-6-3 01:15 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

如果係我,我會問清楚,跟住同佢攤牌,宜家好多小朋友都係單親家庭長大,我以前做青少年中心都見唔少,但係都唔係全部唔開心呀.我覺得如果小朋友將來係跟你,你要諗點同佢地講你地係為左咩離婚,因為係好影響佢(小朋友)點睇你老公o架!
如果啞忍咪好似我奶奶咁o羅!我老爺包二奶(成十年),仲成日係我奶奶面前贊個隻野幾叻,幾能幹(我老爺係大陸開廠的),你話...俾我真係忍唔到

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毛毛虫

別墅

積分: 710

38^#

發表於 05-6-3 09:51 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

sylviawong 寫道:
如果係我,我會問清楚,跟住同佢攤牌,宜家好多小朋友都係單親家庭長大,我以前做青少年中心都見唔少,但係都唔係全部唔開心呀.我覺得如果小朋友將來係跟你,你要諗點同佢地講你地係為左咩離婚,因為係好影響佢(小朋友)點睇你老公o架!
如果啞忍咪好似我奶奶咁o羅!我老爺包二奶(成十年),仲成日係我奶奶面前贊個隻野幾叻,幾能幹(我老爺係大陸開廠的),你話...俾我真係忍唔到

你奶奶係唔係"忍"者黎架, 咁都忍得到! 比我同你老爺講, 我出面都有條仔呀, 勁過你不知幾多呀

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東京mewmew

大宅

積分: 2072

39^#

發表於 05-6-3 12:29 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

[quote]
ringoivy 寫道:

sanho講得

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Lorry

大宅

積分: 1517

40^#

發表於 05-6-3 16:32 |只看該作者

Re: What should I do - I found some condoms in my hushand's brief case

chuchuma,
I read thru all the messages in this thread and I suspect that your husband seems to find himself useless in this family (since you are the main finanical support). Of course i dont know the whole story and background, but would he be like thinking himself has no contributions cos you said he helped out for the baby and the family affairs before, but he now stopped.
not just that, he started to see/date other girls. has you been giving an impression that you are too independent so that he found himself useless?
There is no offend and please dont get me wrong. Would you be the main source of the problem?
Sorry to raise the above question and I have say that I, like every woman in the world, cannot tolerate a third person in my family. But, make a step backward and think that who causes the problem today and it is just your husband's problem of being infaithful to you?
Please dont angry with me on all the above points and questions.

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