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Baby Kingdom - 親子王國香港討論區 › 首頁 › 夫婦情感› 老公對我施壓!!

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樓主: ellislui

老公對我施壓!! [複製鏈接]

123

ellislui

男爵府

積分: 6071

21^#

發表於 05-6-24 18:08 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

感謝大家, 縱合你們的意見, 令我更明白現在的處境, 原先我意為自己已經發圍, 或者, 藉此可以扭轉一些情況, 什至改變她對我的態度, 但似乎從你們這些過來人的經驗, 唯有接受, 忍耐....才是'辦法', 又似乎, 大家都認為99就是如此這般...

99=長輩=女皇, 咁, 即係鬥唔過!!!

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姑姑

大宅

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22^#

發表於 05-6-24 23:35 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

我時運高, 我睇你唔到．．．．我睇你唔到．．．．．．．．．．．．

Always keep smiling....

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ellislui

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積分: 6071

23^#

發表於 05-6-25 09:30 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

我時運高, 我睇你唔到! 我時運高, 我睇你唔到! 我時運高, 我睇你唔到! 我時運高, 我睇你唔到! 我時運高, 我睇你唔到!

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Jesusma

複式洋房

積分: 338

24^#

發表於 05-6-25 11:11 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

比得99照顧，您都遇咗佢唔會同您想法一致，因為您唔係佢個女。除非無辨法，否則都係叫阿媽幫手。我99等我BB出世幾日，先同我地講唔湊。我坐月個時，佢住隔離都無過嚟睇吓個孫。攪到我要抱住個女返外家叫阿媽幫手。舊年我阿媽有病，唔可以幫手，我係被迫比個女99照顧，老公仲請埋工人比佢，佢重唔知足，成日話做多好多嘢。係佢自己開聲要湊，又要埋怨，難道我阿媽唔辛苦，佢無人幫，重煮埋比我哋食，我老公一點都唔知足，重成日話佢阿媽辛苦，甘嘅男人同99都有既，我都倒霉啦！

不過，以我嘅性格，會比個孫佢睇，因為佢係嫲嫲，但唔會對99好似以前無事甘。

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googoo

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好媽媽勳章醒目開學勳章畀面勳章

25^#

發表於 05-6-25 12:09 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

我諗婆媳關係真係死症黎咯~~ 佢活到一把年紀，要佢就你/
讓步，無乜可能；要你老公一面倒幫你，都無乜可能，因爲
始終o個個係佢亞媽。老公係夾心人，都唔係好受~~ 仲可
能有d 兄弟姊妹既 peer pressure, “乜你老婆搞到亞媽喊曬
呀！” - 嘩，有d 變左千古罪人添！
唯有自己tsup生，盡量避免衝突咯。

之前有個post 問奶奶同你跌落水，老公會救邊個先---
呢個明係難爲老公既問題。
我會問，如果老公同個仔一齊跌落水，你會救邊個先？
我就一定會救個仔。個仔再大d,我都係救個仔。
所以如果你老公話會救亞媽，你應該話佢有情有義。
所以如果你老公而家幫亞媽，你都唔好take it too personally 咯.

我諗我呢d 小小睇法，未必幫到你，但希望你能明白老公都好難做，希望你倆可以work out a solution, that you both feel comfortable with. Good luck.

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455

別墅

積分: 840

26^#

發表於 05-6-25 12:21 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

我之前都有問過我老公呢個問題, 佢就唸都無唸就答我, "會救呀媽, 因為親生呀媽一生得一個, 但係老婆就可以聚過第二個!" 我聽左之後一d都無嬲無呷醋, 因為我都覺得好有道理, 而我都覺得婆媳問題永遠存在, 又有好多灰色地帶, 正所謂公說公有理, 婆說婆有理, 有時好似兩邊都有唔啱, 有時又好似兩邊都無錯, 總之就好似個波向前碌, 永遠有話停!
但子欲養而親不在, 我哋d後生唯就得咪就下囉, 無謂攪到無灣轉, 再唔係咪敬而遠之, 避得就避囉!

googoo 寫道:

之前有個post 問奶奶同你跌落水，老公會救邊個先---
呢個明係難爲老公既問題。
我會問，如果老公同個仔一齊跌落水，你會救邊個先？
我就一定會救個仔。個仔再大d,我都係救個仔。
所以如果你老公話會救亞媽，你應該話佢有情有義。
所以如果你老公而家幫亞媽，你都唔好take it too personally 咯.

因為愛...所以等待...

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liwoodma

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27^#

發表於 05-6-25 12:24 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

真係家家有本難唸的經..... :cry:

[img align=left]http://www.pau.com.hk/liwood/IMG_0764.gif[/img]Liwood Ma Ma [url=liwood.pau.com.hk/gallery]MyBB Album[/url]

[email protected]

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Jolly

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積分: 10241

28^#

發表於 05-6-25 16:12 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

koo,
:-( 你daddy去得咁突然既? :-( 你節哀順變呀... :-( 你係大女, 好好地安慰你媽媽呀...你地個個都成家立室, 我諗老人家都好安慰, 但余下你媽媽難免會lonely一點喇... 多D陪佢...幫我問候佢...
你自己岩岩先小產冇耐, 爸爸又過世, 你要小心自己body呀... :cry:
你99個日自己抱仔仔落街真係要

, 我諗佢其實都知知地自己衰, 但以佢性格佢一定唔會同你認低威, 所以咪捉佢個仔你老公來開刀囉!!

冇格, 你老公成功同到BB返去比佢睇佢咪覺得好彩仲有個仔壓得住個新抱囉, 如果你一定唔比你99見個孫你99咪覺得佢個仔'嫁'左比你, 乜話事權都冇晒囉.

我同你分析一下, 係前者既話- 你99開心又得意, 你老公就tum掂阿媽但得罪老婆, 婚姻有危機, 都唔開心得去邊. 你最唔開心, 99從此同你勢不兩立, 又同老公關係轉差. :-( 後者呢, 你99實呼天搶地, 同人講佢新抱大晒, 連個仔都跟左你姓. 以後同你面左左. 你老公會比佢阿媽boycott, 比說話佢聽, 但當然, 話晒自己個仔, 唔會為難佢好耐, 但佢都會唔開心. 你有晒face, 唔係話開心晒, 但條氣順番D.

其實我都分析得幾extreme, 但總括來說, 我明白你當時何以會對你99講個D話, 又明白你點解咁激氣. 我局外人, 比我可能會咁, 孫仔我照比佢睇, 但make sure你老公同番佢返屋企. 暫時我都唔會比佢湊了, 反正請了工人你又正在sick leave中. 長遠呢就迉D先decide啦.

你記住喎, 你係嫁比你老公, 唔係嫁比你99呀, 唔駛同佢做人世呀. 要緊都係緊你同你老公既關係先啦~

有咩幫手就開聲喎~

I support autism acceptance!

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talkative

禁止訪問

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畀面勳章環保接龍勳章

29^#

發表於 05-6-25 16:20 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

提示: 作者被禁止或刪除內容自動屏蔽

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Nokin

複式洋房

積分: 195

30^#

發表於 05-6-25 17:16 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

ellislui

知道你爸爸突然過世, 相信你一定好傷心, 我亦為你難過。希望你可以慢慢忘記那種傷痛, 願你爸爸得安息。:cry:

我好明白, 在此情此境, 連自己老公都不幫自己, 又要照顧bb, 真係好辛苦, 無哂支援。有時做人都幾無奈, 好多事都不由自己, 因為人真的好有限。我都想不到有什麼方法可以幫你, 只希望你可以快d病好, bb係呢段時間乖乖地, 令你易過一點。

不要太傷心。祝福你及你媽咪!

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mother904

翡翠宮

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畀面勳章

31^#

發表於 05-6-25 18:02 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

如果係我，我唔會再俾bb佢湊，我諗之前你都諗定俾bb邊個湊，所以唔會係大問題。唔俾佢湊，都要俾佢見，一星期見一次之類，但係一定唔會由老公帶bb返去，要返一齊返，等奶奶知邊個先係媽咪。

見到面可以好聲好氣，佢態度唔好係佢既事，同老公亦唔需要話係因為佢呀媽錯所以唔俾佢湊bb，可以講佢身體唔好，自己呀媽好想湊，自己掛住bb之類，等佢冇藉口發圍。

日日是好日

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ellislui

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積分: 6071

32^#

發表於 05-6-25 18:33 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

多謝大家的安慰!

原先諗住算, 大家都無計, 唯有用呢招: 我時運高, 我睇你唔到!

唔鬼理佢, 好彩返

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Nokin

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33^#

發表於 05-6-26 13:16 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

ellislui

我吾認識你, 但我好明白你。因為我之前都面對過類似o既情況, 所以我知你一定好傷心。

希望你honey都會體諒同愛護你, 因為你又要安慰你媽咪, 又要揍bb, 係呢段時間你真係好需要有個人去依靠同陪住你。

祝福你!

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HoHoMom

別墅

積分: 573

34^#

發表於 05-6-27 11:03 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

ellislui,

我覺得忍是要忍一點，但不用粵語長片式地委屈自己吧！而且你老公也不反對与你媽同住，可否先邀請你媽跟你們暫住並請她照顧BB，那可使她不用獨個兒留在家裹，你BB又有親人照顧。遲些，你可請工人，由你媽supervise，那她不用那麼辛苦。這樣一步一步來，把你們依賴你99的程度逐步減低。日子久了，你99會發現自己不是那麼重要，要見BB也須你合作，她的態度也不可能再那麼驕橫。我相信只要你堅持，一定可見太陽！

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prettywife

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積分: 6787

35^#

發表於 05-6-27 15:30 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

ellislui,

just a few words:
try your very best to forgive her.
it will certainly make you feel better!
anyhow your mother-in-law is the mother of your husband. if you forgive her, it's a win-win situation cos your husband will feel relieved.

i know it's hard but let's try.

i've experience that my mother-in-law sometimes makes unnecessary remarks that really upset me. having considered that what she did / said is for the good of my kids and she is anyway the mother of my husband, I would forgive her and keep my mouth shut.

Be happy!

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ellislui

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積分: 6071

36^#

發表於 05-6-27 17:42 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

prettywife,

thank you for your advice, I felt much better these few days (on my lose: baby and father), so, less anger as resulted, I do forgive her and might be we would meet in my father's funeral some days later, think that she certainly would not talk to me with her 'usual' attitude on that day and I would try to keep silent as far as possible

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ellislui

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積分: 6071

37^#

發表於 05-7-7 22:18 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

there is something new of the issue

yesterday, the birthday of my husband, we planned to have dinner together with 99 and my mother, but, 99 refused to come, consequently, only father-in-law turned up and paid all his attention to the baby, he really love my son very much....

This morning, 99 called and claimed she had prepared red pockets at home and asked husband to take, but he hadn't, said we were having '白事', she turned more angry and even refused to answer any call from my husband....According form f-in-law, she would not go to the funeral of my father

husband became frustrated, he agreed that 99 is very very 'small gas' but didn't know how to deal with, I say nothing as this is a fact and I knew it for very long while

just update and see whether any suggestion / advice, thank you

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姑姑

大宅

積分: 2712

38^#

發表於 05-7-8 11:13 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

If there is having '白事', you should not visit others home in hundred days. It's told by the 'C Full' during my father's funeral. Every family member should follow. My m-in law don't believe and said after 49 days will be over and ask us to visit my hubby's younger brother wedding...... he got a serious car accident in that year. That may affect the ppl alive!!!!

You can ask you husband talk to his father that you don't want any unhappy thing happen caused by this matter....

It may not be true, but no one want to see such thing, right?

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hihicathk

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積分: 7711

39^#

發表於 05-7-8 17:53 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

ELLISLUI

知到你剛剛受到雙重打擊, 心裡一定很難過了...

但是, 奶奶那方面我想你暫時掉低一排先0拉.而家風頭火勢, 大家講咩都無用.

首先搞好爸爸0既野先至再諗其他野.

違規簽名-超版代刪

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yellow

大宅

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40^#

發表於 05-7-8 22:46 |只看該作者

Re: 老公對我施壓!!

HoHoMom 寫道:
ellislui,

我覺得忍是要忍一點，但不用粵語長片式地委屈自己吧！而且你老公也不反對与你媽同住，可否先邀請你媽跟你們暫住並請她照顧BB，那可使她不用獨個兒留在家裹，你BB又有親人照顧。遲些，你可請工人，由你媽supervise，那她不用那麼辛苦。這樣一步一步來，把你們依賴你99的程度逐步減低。日子久了，你99會發現自己不是那麼重要，要見BB也須你合作，她的態度也不可能再那麼驕橫。我相信只要你堅持，一定可見太陽！

我已經成功咁做到呢個step...你都要努力呀!!