My husband also has a long working schedule. He usually gets very tired too. Men are different with women, if they are tired, they would rather sleep than eat (or shower). You should try to use his point of view to see thing. Try not to be too bossy, I usually only tell my husband once (gently). He is an adult, he knows what to do. Meanwhile, I am a full- time mom too. I try to handle as much housework as possible, as I am still looking for a new maid. My main duty at the moment is to keep the house in order (neat), take care my son.
Don't take your husband's word too seriously. I think he was just too tired. You can try to be more sincere next time.