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大宅

積分: 1048


21#
發表於 06-12-29 00:45 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

各位兄弟姊妹﹐ 請受我一拜

睇到大家既意見﹐我真係覺得自己係用pat pat 諗野 我真係唔可以好似大家甘冷靜地分析得甘詳細呀。。。我當時既反應真係好panic﹐ 可能同佢成10年都未試過俾佢甘話過同嬲甘耐既。。。我都係EQ低果隻﹐ 成日都接唔到火。。。。我依個老公係出名惡同大男人﹐ 而我好似你地話都幾大女人(其實之前仲大女人﹐依家已經小左好多啦)﹐ 甘樣都係成日嗌交囉。。

今朝我都諗過同佢過唔好 cancel trip﹐ 佢話OK。。。但隔一陣佢又話都係唔去啦﹐ 因司機唔得閒﹐佢又唔想開甘耐車。。。唉﹗ 我仲以為係trip度可以關係好D﹐ 依家甘我又開始有D “蚊”呀。。。

今日﹐有D對答但唔多好少﹐又無身體接觸﹐ 感覺我好似好陌生甘。。。
最後我今晚就好早俾個仔仔訓(老公成日想BB訓8點)﹐ 仲以為會大家睇電視有野講﹐ 都唔係既﹐ 只係得個睇字﹐ 睇完佢又去訓覺啦。。。都唔知為乜?

mrsegg, 你好似讀心理學甘﹐ 好勁﹐ 講既野都全中﹐真希望有你係我身邊處處提點我就好啦。。。我好衰﹐ 其他人講野我會聽﹐但自己老公講野就博嘴先都未必聽。。。。做你老公真幸福呀﹗﹗


水晶宮

積分: 67993


22#
發表於 06-12-29 01:10 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

pegbrian ,

同佢講你好想同佢去旅行啦!上次旅行佢黎唔到其實你都失望架, 嗲下佢..............你佬又可能試緊你, 你箸唔箸緊佢。如果佢真係唔想去旅行,你問下佢想去邊?

其實如果得,你由e+朝朝陪佢食早餐啦!一個人食野真係幾淒涼葉咁架!
天空之城, 快樂之地


大宅

積分: 1967


23#
發表於 06-12-29 01:18 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

pegbrian 寫道:
各位兄弟姊妹﹐ 請受我一拜

睇到大家既意見﹐我真係覺得自己係用pat pat 諗野 我真係唔可以好似大家甘冷靜地分析得甘詳細呀。。。我當時既反應真係好panic﹐ 可能同佢成10年都未試過俾佢甘話過同嬲甘耐既。。。我都係EQ低果隻﹐ 成日都接唔到火。。。。我依個老公係出名惡同大男人﹐ 而我好似你地話都幾大女人(其實之前仲大女人﹐依家已經小左好多啦)﹐ 甘樣都係成日嗌交囉。。

今朝我都諗過同佢過唔好 cancel trip﹐ 佢話OK。。。但隔一陣佢又話都係唔去啦﹐ 因司機唔得閒﹐佢又唔想開甘耐車。。。唉﹗ 我仲以為係trip度可以關係好D﹐ 依家甘我又開始有D “蚊”呀。。。

今日﹐有D對答但唔多好少﹐又無身體接觸﹐ 感覺我好似好陌生甘。。。
最後我今晚就好早俾個仔仔訓(老公成日想BB訓8點)﹐ 仲以為會大家睇電視有野講﹐ 都唔係既﹐ 只係得個睇字﹐ 睇完佢又去訓覺啦。。。都唔知為乜?

mrsegg, 你好似讀心理學甘﹐ 好勁﹐ 講既野都全中﹐真希望有你係我身邊處處提點我就好啦。。。我好衰﹐ 其他人講野我會聽﹐但自己老公講野就博嘴先都未必聽。。。。做你老公真幸福呀﹗﹗




PEGBRIAN呀,
都很高興認識你,希望大家日後可以多點溝通和提點。

其實男人又好女人又好,對方愈是對自己好,自己便愈放肆,因為知道自己吃硬了對方嘛!對方愈是對自己不好,自己便愈想留住對方的心,這個是很容易理解的,就等同你忽略了老公,老公便感到不快,到你著緊他了,他卻擺出毫不在乎的姿態....

婚姻就好像一仗永沒完的仗,要在這裡間得到平衡是很不容易的!


大宅

積分: 1048


24#
發表於 06-12-29 12:11 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

其實我仲有佢講過既一句說話無同大家講﹐ 依家個心都仲為了這句說話放唔低。。但因大家係講英文既﹐所以無中文甘直接瓜﹐﹐﹐佢話﹕"I tell you the truth, before i have faithful to you but not this year", then i ask what do u mean? he said " you think yourself", then i reply again " you don't have faithful to me, you have faithful with others?", he said NO.

因之前講過﹐ 我係有問過佢有無女朋友或識另一個﹐佢話無﹐仲好嬲甘叫我唔好問D甘蠢既問題﹐佢唔想答甘蠢既問題。。。。。

大家﹐mrsegg,
如好似佢甘講﹐你地又覺得點解﹖我諗緊今晚想問清楚佢依句說話既意思﹐但佢未必答我。。。

:-| :-|


水晶宮

積分: 67993


25#
發表於 06-12-29 12:31 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

i reply again " you don't have faithful to me, you have faithful with others?", he said NO.


我覺得佢既然答左NO你就信佢啦!好似你講"佢未必答我。。。" 問咪盞鬧交。就算問都唔係e段時間問,係你取回佢個心時問佢:咁你e+仲faithful to me。

點解係e+你仲用心思佢諗呢d野,唔用d時間去做d野改善大家,改變彊局呢? (sorry 可能唔係咁岩聽)

一對夫婦 (s/b係人) 鬧交時往往都會講d難聽說話,但未必真係咁意思,即本係講完已經後悔, 不過死要面,死撐。你唔好對你老公d bad words咁上心啦!

努力!加油!
天空之城, 快樂之地


大宅

積分: 4313


26#
發表於 06-12-29 12:50 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

各位,我現在都是在困惑及痛苦中,可以給些意見我嗎?
我之前之link在下面
第三者


水晶宮

積分: 67993


27#
發表於 06-12-29 12:58 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

最重要係你老公有乜打算?想離同第三者一齊?想你接受,享齊人之福?
天空之城, 快樂之地


大宅

積分: 4313


28#
發表於 06-12-29 13:39 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

我都不知道!!
PCCW2319 寫道:
最重要係你老公有乜打算?想離同第三者一齊?想你接受,享齊人之福?


水晶宮

積分: 67993


29#
發表於 06-12-29 13:43 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

Imcheung,

下!佢同你講有第三者,乜你連問都唔問下佢打算點架咩?佢e+仲同第三者一齊?為什麼佢會同你坦白?
天空之城, 快樂之地


水晶宮

積分: 51073

至尊種植勳章 醒目開學勳章 畀面勳章 環保接龍勳章


30#
發表於 06-12-29 14:13 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

pegbrian,
我都覺得:
1) 妳幾大女人 (sorry)
2) 妳老公都算幾好

妳老公係咪d唔識講中文(廣東話/普通話),只係識母語(福建話/客家話/潮州話)同英文&印尼文既土生華僑呀?
識網友只限吹下水、交換下資訊、發揮網力,邊個認真就邊個輸。


大宅

積分: 4313


31#
發表於 06-12-29 14:37 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

其實是近日因有一次,他晚上9時多出街表示與一位男性朋友去喝嘢(這些好像是男人專有的權利,我們做女人做媽媽的便在家中看家),至零晨4時多才回家,其間我曾打電話找他,他說在葵涌回家,但我知他是約了在屯門見面,為何要走一大段轉移路回家(我們往北區),當日我等他回家想與他談,他表不要睡覺,我很氣說不如離婚,他不答我便睡了.
第二天我很氣,帶了一對子女在外,他一直在後跟隨,但我不理他,又要大女兒不理她!其實那天女兒都很可憐,問為何不可理他,見爸爸有次想走時差點想哭!!
第三天我發電郵說要與他離婚,他反而說是有事傷害了我!晚上亦是我再主動問他是否有事要告訴我,我才知道有第三者!!對離婚一事他沒有表示好或不好! 我即時反應向他說:你是否早有此心意,現由我開聲先,你是否會感到自己比較好過?他沒有答我!

我沒有即時問他點選,我問他心內是否有我,有2個小朋友,他說是錫我們的,但似走不入我們的世界,又說有些時機過去了便很難補回來(我想他是指與子女建立親密關係一事上,我估,會是嗎),亦是此令他很亂,很心煩,他表示要時間去想!

那是表示什麼?兩邊都不想放棄?他至今都沒有因此向我說對不起,反是我向他寫了我的心意及表白我的想法,及我會修補一切而付出的努力,他暫未有回應!

至今已三天了,我都是容容氣氣的,沒有吵鬧,因為對事沒有幫助;他的態度就一時時,有時冷冷的,有時又如沒有事發生過一樣,令我很困擾及傷心!!

昨晚他回家吃飯,他說在旺角回家,但我在電話定位追蹤(他不知道我有此check的功能)上發現他是在青衣,會是和那女子一起嗎?晚上當小朋友與他玩時,我發現他手上沒有了結婚介子,問他在那,他隨便說一地方,我找不到,再問他,他就說打足球時脫下,應在車上的足球袋內,會是真的嗎? 

我又亂又迷惑,要信他嗎?要等他嗎?


子爵府

積分: 12365


32#
發表於 06-12-29 14:55 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

pegbrain~


水晶宮

積分: 67993


33#
發表於 06-12-29 15:40 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

Imcheung,

你係咪成日提離婚架?我個人覺其實佢唔答你,就好似 = 默認。

第二天我很氣,帶了一對子女在外,他一直在後跟隨,但我不理他,又要大女兒不理她!其實那天女兒都很可憐,問為何不可理他,見爸爸有次想走時差點想哭!!-----你咁做令佢好冇爸爸專嚴,你係咪成日係仔女面落佢面?I think that is why 佢話他說是錫你們的,但似走不入你們的世界。


有些時機過去了便很難補回來(我想他是指與你關係多d)

我諗你再同佢傾下啦!話時話佢地開始左幾耐?
天空之城, 快樂之地


大宅

積分: 1048


34#
發表於 06-12-29 15:44 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

sorry i'm in internet center can't use chinese. he is a chinese indonesian, so he can't read or speak chinese.

i understand sometime while couple fighting, we will say something bad accidently, but i'm just afraid actually that's a hint for me, if i ignore it will i be stupid to let him continue that.....of course now i can't judge him if he really has affair or not..but so far i know him as a husband for 10 yrs, i don't really think he will but things change.....also he has a big example for him to follow, his own father has 2 wives too legally , my husband is from the first wife, his father keep two away from each other, but everyday go to 2 places. you see, if he has this kind of bad example, will make him be more chance to be a cheated husband???
so, you guys think i better don't mention this "unfaithful" question while we start little talking??? and wait until we totally recovered ??
haaii...now i become so sensitive of everything, i even can drive pass his office to see if his car there or not. i wll also call his office, if the operator say he is out, i will call his handphone, but usually can't reach him for the first few calls, few mintues later he will call me back.....then he said he is with customer can't pick up... my best friend know all this, she said my husband is mentally abusing me, he like to say many things to make me lost my confident and self-esteem. she ask me to be more confident again...

i really don't know if we can go back to normal relationship and sweet anymore, we never fight this way....


大宅

積分: 1048


35#
發表於 06-12-29 15:45 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

[quote]
eeb 寫道:
pegbrian,
我都覺得:
1) 妳幾大女人 (sorry)
2) 妳老公都算幾好

eeb, how come you said my husband is good ga????


水晶宮

積分: 51073

至尊種植勳章 醒目開學勳章 畀面勳章 環保接龍勳章


36#
發表於 06-12-29 16:16 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

其實我覺得妳疑心重多過似佢不忠,妳同小朋友回港成兩個月,佢返到屋企可能覺得家不成家至出去出面瞓。

如果妳回想自己做媽咪前同做媽咪後既轉變,再由佢出發去諗,可能妳會發覺有d嘢係對佢唔公平,雖然有咗小朋友個family dynamic should be expected to change a lot, but it doesn't necessary that he could handle it like you could. I think you are a young couple and he's still expecting those sweetness and romances between 2 ppl. When's the last time you go out with him (just the 2 of you)?

Somehow the Chineses in Indonesia I know (my husband's parents and relatives, my friends' parents, my uni friends) are all very nice ppl. I am not saying that because of they are nice they won't cheat, but the issue here may not be cheating.

Will be great if you spend the time not to check him, but to get to know more ppl in town and make some friends. Have your own circle and live like an average 少奶奶 there, don't lock yourself in the house and avoid the outside community. And get some balance between "family" and "couple" and show your love and respect to him.
識網友只限吹下水、交換下資訊、發揮網力,邊個認真就邊個輸。


翡翠宮

積分: 76971


37#
發表於 06-12-29 16:16 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

有時做一個太精明既太太到頭來只苦了自己, 既然你有咁好既家底, 咁能幹既老公, 倒不如做返一個平凡既太太好過啦 :lol:

互相猜疑係夫妻相處既大忌 就係因為你呢個猜疑令到你唔甘心做一個好太太, 何謂好太太...就係溫柔體貼個種, 因為你既猜疑令到你起桿(好似隻蟹咁) 同老公撐到行, 放底尊嚴, 兩夫妻係應該互相扶持, 佢在外做野亦有佢一定既壓力 你在家亦有你持家既壓力 所以當佢在外邊有壓力返到你, 你幫佢鬆下骨按摩下, 我深信你呢d無聲勝有聲既態度比起你惡屎能登個樣可愛得多 你試諗下, 你比起好多好好幸福了, 有大屋有兩個工人使, 自己只係專注教小朋友, 點解仲要自尋煩惱呢


大宅

積分: 4313


38#
發表於 06-12-29 16:16 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

PCCW2319
今次是我與他結婚十年來第一次說要離婚!
我當然不會在子女面前數爸爸啦,外面人都說我們是一個幸福的家庭,只是我兩個小朋友都是吃人奶長大的,而且4人一房,細仔(1歲多)現在依然在吃人奶,每晚的時間都是給了他們,故他們亦十分c身!而他放在小朋友身上的時間又是十分少的,在家時都是在看電視看報紙或打電腦,有時不想小朋友吵到他,我便帶他們回房玩及安排他們睡眠(好似變成是女人之必然工作啦),我想他是有呷子女醋的,尤其當2個小朋友要媽媽,不要爸爸時...


PCCW2319 寫道:
Imcheung,

你係咪成日提離婚架?我個人覺其實佢唔答你,就好似 = 默認。

第二天我很氣,帶了一對子女在外,他一直在後跟隨,但我不理他,又要大女兒不理她!其實那天女兒都很可憐,問為何不可理他,見爸爸有次想走時差點想哭!!-----你咁做令佢好冇爸爸專嚴,你係咪成日係仔女面落佢面?I think that is why 佢話他說是錫你們的,但似走不入你們的世界。


有些時機過去了便很難補回來(我想他是指與你關係多d)

我諗你再同佢傾下啦!話時話佢地開始左幾耐?


水晶宮

積分: 67993


39#
發表於 06-12-29 16:17 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

如果佢要學就唔係今時今日至學啦!

如果佢有第三者,未必會同講faithful to you la, 佢應該當冇事發生,then everyday go to 2 places.

你不去拎D玩健身、纖體宣傳單張、報名表額,今晚同佢一齊睇,叫佢幫手揀,打開話題啦。不過如果佢仍然木口木面,你都唔好 ,記住比D耐性。
天空之城, 快樂之地


大宅

積分: 1048


40#
發表於 06-12-29 16:27 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

PCCW2319 寫道:
如果佢要學就唔係今時今日至學啦!

如果佢有第三者,未必會同講faithful to you la, 佢應該當冇事發生,then everyday go to 2 places.

你不去拎D玩健身、纖體宣傳單張、報名表額,今晚同佢一齊睇,叫佢幫手揀,打開話題啦。不過如果佢仍然木口木面,你都唔好 ,記住比D耐性。


really as you said, whenever he use his "wood mouth wood face" while i'm trying to open conversation, i will get angry and mad.....then i leave the area. i guess now i will hv to try to hold my anger but it's hard for me to give him smile while i'm still in pain.

i guess now when you reply my message need to type pegbrian, sometimes i confuse you answering me or imcheung.

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