夫婦情感 今日: 4 | 主題: 42773

積分: 38391

101^#

發表於 07-1-3 13:46 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

pegbrian：
我唔係潑你冷水，我個人覺得你都要有心理準備，希望係我睇錯。

PCCW 2391的辦法都好好，可以照辦。問題係在你地之間可能已經有太深的隔膜，唔係一時之間可以解決，最慘就佢現時可能唔係好想解決。-------------"個問題係他已放棄我所以先去睇出面既花花世界"。

之前可係佢一時感觸先喊左出黎，但現時你同佢say sorry又好似冇效不特止，仲要煩到走左。

我個人直覺都唔排除佢想要仔唔要媽。你現時無謂追問佢去左邊之類的問題，亦都唔好係唔係都say sorry。冇錯態度要溫柔，但如果講太多sorry，反而加強左佢覺得係你錯的信念。

講心裡的感覺，你一定唔及個女仔，我見過有男人為左一個半年的女仔而放棄10年的老婆。但你未必輸。PCCW的家庭樂會係有力的point。

件事唔會咁快有答案，你暫時唔好叫佢比咩promise 你。你要預左長期戰爭。祝成功！

我近日忽然發錢寒，要努力搵錢儲錢呀！$$$

私人傳訊

pegbrian

積分: 1048

102^#

發表於 07-1-3 13:48 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

Hello, Pegbrian,

I've said, you are really at risk.

But don't be exhausted, as a man, I think you can save your marriage and you will win eventually.

I have a detail advice to give you but no time to write now, at this moment, i think the way pccw 2319 can work, try, don't lose at the hands of Indonensia woman!!![/quote]

pls write me the detail advice, hope i can follow some to make him stay la.....do u think what i did are wrong??? why he can't stop seeing that girl when he said he isn't seriously with her and will get rid of her anyway......

私人傳訊

Elefant老婆

積分: 37317

好媽媽勳章醒目開學勳章畀面勳章

103^#

發表於 07-1-3 15:07 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

因為依家既問題唔係個女仔﹐而係你同你先生既關係。即係話如果佢同呢個女仔分手﹐但你同佢關係未搞好﹐將來都一樣有另一個或兩個。直到有一日﹐當佢遇到一個鐘意既﹐可能就將個女仔做情婦﹐二奶。

如果佢爸爸都係有兩個老婆﹐甘就好難講會唔會從一而終。因為有好多野佢都會覺得係理所當然。

冰凍三尺非一日之寒。其實你唔應該返香港甘耐。每次返十日都好過你一次返成個幾月。

另外你可能太自我﹐忽略佐佢既需要。人係會變﹐尤其係年紀大佐﹐接觸人面唔同以前讀書果陣。不知不覺間﹐大家平時無溝通﹐雙方步伐越黎越遠。

依家好可能係你好難受既時刻﹐因為你做乜都唔得﹐唔岩。我唔知你地大家點走埋一齊﹐不過你同佢都應該諗諗以前因乜愛上大家。

pegbrian 寫道:
hope i can follow some to make him stay la.....do u think what i did are wrong??? why he can't stop seeing that girl when he said he isn't seriously with her and will get rid of her anyway......

私人傳訊

HKU_LLM

複式洋房

積分: 186

104^#

發表於 07-1-3 15:45 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

Hi Pegbrian,

Sorry for late reply, I am not an expert in family affairs, I can only tell how I decide to start an affair with another woman after 12 years faithful marriage, and why I can (as you say: have sex with another woman but still living with my wife) and finally ceased this affair.
I think my case bears several similiarity with yours. Forgive me, My wife was bad tamper and always black face like you, she likes to control all my time (like you always checking the whereabouts of your husband). My character also likes your husband, always bears the wives' unreasonable manner (pls. forgive me again.) So, I hope my thought will let you understand your husband more.

Before I met my ex-mistress, I am very frustrated how my wife treat me. She always thinks man should be "given way" to woman and in the "upper hand" position. I don't mind, but remember this words :

" I am not a sex maniac, but men are sex driven animals."

So, when I was always up set by my wives' unreasonable refusal/cool to sex, (excuse for tried, work tomorrow, perform like a dead fish, not enjoy in the process, refuse my special request). I felt extremely down and I met a woman (divorced), she knows clearly my situation but she willing to be my mistress, of course, I have stable income, quiet handsome and well educated. But surprisingly, she need not my financial support and very enjoy with me, of course very proactive at bed. At that moment, I thought she love me more than my wife and willing to do anything I wish her to do.

When I was at bed with my wife, sometimes I ask her to ml, she will refuse as usual. Do you know what I think at that moment..My brain thought "Fine, You think you are the only woman in the world, Hm". Then I sleep and wait for the chance to meet my mistress. Until my wife become very unreasonable, though she doesn't know my affairs but she sometimes throw things or beat on me when her mood was bad. I fight back to her (the 1st time after my 14 years marriage), I talked the divorce with her. ( I really have the information of my lawyer on hand and prepared for the proceedings). Surprisingly, my wife started to change her everything. On the other hand, my mistress looks annoyed me for not give her sufficient time with her. I ceased the connection with her. That's the gist of my story.

In your case, it was far more serious than I think last night. When your c6 was franked about his affair, I think he have prepared for the matter, you know what....as VKwan said:

我唔係潑你冷水，我個人覺得你都要有心理準備，希望係我睇錯。

but I also agreed PCCW 2391的辦法都好好，可以照辦。問題係在你地之間可能已經有太深的隔膜，唔係一時之間可以解決，

And your c6 just like me.最慘就係他已放棄我所以先去睇出面既花花世界"。And the 3rd woman must do something you (do/can) not do.

Now, 之前可係佢一時感觸先喊左出黎，但現時你同佢say sorry又好似冇效不特止，仲要煩到走左。Really, don't say too much sorry, you black face is your character, not something right or wrong，但如果講太多sorry，反而加強左佢覺得係你錯的信念。but 態度要溫柔

PCCW的家庭樂會係有力的point。

Really, 件事唔會咁快有答案，你暫時唔好叫佢比咩promise 你。你要預左長期戰爭

But I personlly thinks you are a jealous woman and skeptical. Do you know how troublesome when a man have a real business/talk outside, but you always call her back home or ask his whereabouts. You will create unnecessary stress on him. And do you know what his partner/staff will think when they saw your c6 was answering to the family "radar". I think this is the most unnecessary thing you always do.

有時順其自然反而好,打

私人傳訊

Elefant老婆

積分: 37317

好媽媽勳章醒目開學勳章畀面勳章

105^#

發表於 07-1-3 16:08 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

HKU_LLM,

Your experience and insight is very useful. Thank you for sharing.

私人傳訊

HKU_LLM

複式洋房

積分: 186

106^#

發表於 07-1-3 16:30 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

Elefant老婆寫道:
HKU_LLM,

Your experience and insight is very useful. Thank you for sharing.

Thank You, I just want to save others marriage that really unnecessary to break.

私人傳訊

積分: 67993

107^#

發表於 07-1-3 18:25 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

HKU_LLM ,

\

Surprisingly, my wife started to change her everything.

但佢(your wife) 終於能唔能挽回你個心？ (雖然你冇離婚) 我咁問，係想知當太太醒覺 & 改變，通常係咪可以真正挽回丈夫個心 & 人。你係咪好似Pegbrain's 丈夫咁，要觀察你太太好耐，先至決定唔離婚？

Pegbrain,

你老公心裡既圍牆係由你日積月慮親手起，所以你要知道，今日你亦都要相當時間去拆牆。(千祈唔好心急)

agree - DO NOT always checking the whereabouts of your husband. (呢個動作會曾加佢對你反感) 。其實你知佢去邊, 大家心知肚明，你再問盞佢煩厭你。其實佢5:30pm回家時，只需要講你曾經call過佢。

agree - 暫時唔好叫佢比咩promise 你。因為你e+根本仲未比到信心佢。你叫佢一定比咩promise 你，盞佢離山心更重。男人通常會走向無壓力果邊。你做得越好，佢去第三者度會越少。

你要明白/忍受佢一定唔可以即刻離在第三者cos 你e+根本仲未比到信心佢。

但你要佢一定返屋企過夜，因為夜晚時間咁長，第三者可以做好多野tum佢, 而且怕佢習慣。但千祈唔好用promise 呢d字眼，你試下：I really want you to it for me...........。

agrre - prepare to accept his fault, you are really jealous, I can see you are really mind his unfaithful, but if you wish to maintain you family, you must accept, don't say this is unequal, it is the reality. 千祈唔好唔甘心要咁做，如果你仍然覺得錯既係佢, 點解要我咁做。咁你永遠得唔到佢個心返黎。

agree - 有時順其自然反而好,打

天空之城, 快樂之地

私人傳訊

積分: 1967

108^#

發表於 07-1-3 23:42 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

是不是應該暫時不再問他跟那女子的事和不要迫他去決定什麼？

pccw說寫封信給他是個不錯的方法，我也曾試過用寫信去解決問題，因為知道自己面對面同佢傾係講唔晒咁多野，亦有好多野唔係咁易講出口

也許你很不忿他因為你的冷落而有籍口有外遇，但無辦法，無論如何，他的心也同樣碎了，試想下，你老公對你唔好冷落你，而出面有人對你好愛錫你，你要走，你老公才留住你而改過，你又會如何呢？

pccw說得對，不要再check他，在他角度裡，他現在的行為是理所當然，當他報復也好，嚇你也好，先將他現在令你心痛的一切放在一旁，先去做好自己，持之以恆，要挽救未嘗不可：

他說過你沒有為他打理過自己，去買些新衣服，換個新髮形，不要像個師奶一樣，讓他覺得你不是老婆是女友的感覺

現他好像很討厭你攬他，你便暫時不必太主動，當他留意到你的一切，他自然漸漸會對你重新產生興趣和覺得你吸引，雖然愛情不是靠包裝去維繫，但要靠欣賞和幻想去維持，要敵過外間花花世界裡的新鮮野花，你必須下點苦工

其他日常對待，各媽媽的正面建議也請你繼續堅持，例如溫柔的溝通，關心，將他重新溶入你和仔仔的世界裡，不要覺得委屈，更要將這些好變成習慣，不要讓他害怕重修舊好以後，你又是故態復萌

每天煮飯也問一問他吃不吃，不要讓他習慣不回家吃飯，和無交帶，好像pccw說一樣，問一句：「我今晚煮了xxx，你回來吃嗎？」已經可以，如果他說回來，便不要問他幾點回來，不要囉唆，等他回來一起吃，如果仔仔肚餓先給他吃吧，多數家庭都是讓小朋友先食飯，仔仔食飯後，叫工人陪他玩，你兩便可以二人撐台腳，話題不要只圍繞著他跟那女子的事，試下不再提，不再問，講下今天發生過的事，關心下他的工作，如果他肯講，便跟他一起投入那話題

飯後一起跟仔仔玩又好，放水給他沖涼又好，待仔仔訓了，給他按摩一下，不是問他要唔要按摩，而是直接將手放在他身上幫他按摩，傾下計，但都不要問那女子的事或再要他決定什麼，不要破壞氣氛，如果他想睡，幫佢COM好被，goodnight kiss吻一下他的額頭，有時男人也好像女人一樣，要人錫，不要輕看額頭這位置，被吻額頭可以感受到對方的關心和愛護，這種安心的感覺，他一定可以感受到

睡覺時可以穿一些較性感的睡裙，如果他輾轉反側，就代表他對你這種改變是有感覺的，那你要繼續做

早上抱仔仔給他goodbye kiss送他出門，每天中午給他一個愛的sms讓他知道你對他的受的存在

也許要做的事情有太多，意見亦人人不同，只要你自己仍想挽救便盡力去做，但要做得自然和持之以恆，其實到底有沒有那個女子存在或他跟那女子的關係是如何，你根本不知道，只要做好自己就好

私人傳訊

積分: 1967

109^#

發表於 07-1-3 23:52 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

pccw你好叻！可以有這麼多的好主意！

雖然我從未有對唔住我的另一半，但我也一直做好自己，讓他覺得跟我一起永遠都是熱戀期，

有時我會打電話給他扮天氣報告女郎：特別天氣報告！寒流襲港，請多穿衣服，不過唔怕，有我一直愛你，天氣如何變我都會讓你暖笠笠的渡過每一天！咁佢就會係咁笑囉！

有時我又扮問卷調查員：請問你有幾愛你老婆呢？十個啜是最最最愛，請問有幾多個啜呢？請你用啜聲來回答！

也許是看得太多聽得太多，為了悍衛愛情，不得不努力付出的，我好明白長青的愛情，是很須要新鮮的沖擊，男人在外沾花惹草都不過是求新鮮，所以我覺得能夠每天都保鮮是很難，所以在自己仍有條件去做時便去做

私人傳訊

積分: 67993

110^#

發表於 07-1-3 23:56 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

mrsegg,

天空之城, 快樂之地

私人傳訊

pegbrian

積分: 1048

111^#

發表於 07-1-4 00:48 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

好多謝大家甘多既寶貴意見﹐

我今日真係真係忍得好辛苦先至控制到唔打電話俾他。。。自從我既sms 話“雖然講對唔住係唔夠但我都應該要講﹐ 我真係真心去挽救我地依段7年既婚姻﹐ 我知係自在我地是否願意去做﹐ 我知過程好難﹐ 要時間同痛苦﹐ 但我地如想做一定做得到﹐ 我地唔好再做D傷害大家既事啦﹐ 等我地係今次既經驗學會愛同重新開始。所以請俾大家一個機會同時間。。” 他都無再回復我﹐ 我又唔敢問他返唔返黎食飯。。。。唉﹗﹗ 好彩今日他非常準時返到黎﹐ 我抱左仔仔俾他時﹐ 大家有少少眼神接觸但只係1秒因我唔知點面對他。。。。之後就俾他同仔仔玩﹐ 我知我應該參與但他好似唔係好想所以我等到食完飯後先一齐食生果。。。。都唔多講野嫁﹐ 。。。我知大家都俾左好多意見俾我﹐ 我都好想做到每一點但我如write字條﹐ 他會知依個唔係我﹐我係到扮緊野﹐ 我諗都係每日有D關心既sms開始先等到大家既感情有D進展時先做大動作。。。

HKU_LLM
as you said, once you see your wife change all her bad behavior you accept her again?? yes, how long you decide to accept her again?? she has no idea about the affair??? do u think she can sense it actually??? I want to ask if a wife know about affair matter, what's the reason for that cheated husband still continue to request ML at home??? one more question, for a man, already stop one time affair and go back to his family, will he do it again and again??? based on what reason??? i mean should a wife trust her husband again or should live in suspicion for the rest of her life???

I'm sorry to say that, 雖然我地關係仲好唔穩定﹐ 今日他都仲有所要求﹐ 我係有如他所願﹐ 但其間我個心好痛﹐ 諗緊你都同個女仔做過﹐ 我覺得他唔係只屬于我一個人啦。。。我希望大家唔會睇低我依個行為啦。。。

我同意大家既講法﹐ 盡量唔好再問個女仔問題 (雖然心一路想知)﹐ 又唔再問他遲返原因 (但都怕他已成習慣每日去見一見先返屋企老婆又唔敢問。。。) 過返正常生活﹐ 去健身﹐ 做facial 買靚衫囉。。。我諗唔為他亦為自己好﹐ 唔可以再每日留係家中﹐ 我真係會胡思亂想﹐ 五分鐘睇一次老公有無打電話黎。(以前他每日會打俾我一次問做緊乜﹐ 依家都無囉。。 :-( :-( )

另一方面我會穩人跟他一個月穩証明﹐ 亦會同律師傾下小朋友既事先﹐ 準備好如他突然反面﹐ 我都個點做﹐ 但我最希望係他真心返屋企啦。。。希望唔會太耐啦。。。因我唔想等太耐個知結果﹐ 我仲要出去批找工作﹐ 我已有3年無做野啦。。遲D年齡再大D難找啦。。

私人傳訊

積分: 1967

112^#

發表於 07-1-4 00:59 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

我諗你諗多左，如今佢準時返屋企，仲對你有所要求，係佢對你所做的事的反應，是個好開始，唔好諗佢有冇同個女仔做過，根本有冇呢個人既存在我個人都仲好懷疑，明知出去找外遇做一定開心過同老婆做，這是開始軟化的態度

無錯，你諗定後路係應該，但請你要小心，不要讓他知道，否則，一切努力都可以化為烏有

私人傳訊

積分: 1967

113^#

發表於 07-1-4 01:02 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

就算他有意重新開始也不要放「pair」自己，女人除了以孩子和老公為中心，也要以減肥扮靚為終生事業，即使到最後他不要你，你也要好好準備自己，讓自己有條件再找幸福

私人傳訊

積分: 67993

114^#

發表於 07-1-4 01:08 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

I'm sorry to say that, 雖然我地關係仲好唔穩定﹐ 今日他都仲有所要求﹐ 我係有如他所願﹐ 但其間我個心好痛﹐ 諗緊你都同個女仔做過﹐ 我覺得他唔係只屬于我一個人啦。。。我希望大家唔會睇低我依個行為啦。。。

心好痛﹐ 諗緊你都同個女仔做過...............呢個係正常反應。但你應該高興佢仲同你ML , 如果佢唔愛你，佢根本唔想做、唔想同你有任何身體接觸。

我覺得你應該試下盡投入，唔好令佢有"夫顯" or dead fish感覺。呢個時候佢亦可能將你同第三者比較。其實有情趣性生活對男人 or 一段婚姻都幾重要。

天空之城, 快樂之地

私人傳訊

happykklam

子爵府

積分: 12365

115^#

發表於 07-1-4 01:09 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

以前我又係諗得太多，令到自己好辛苦><"有時諗得太多真係會影響感情架，要維繫或挽救感情，應該盡量唔好胡思亂想呀~

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積分: 67993

116^#

發表於 07-1-4 01:14 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

自從我既sms 話“雖然講對唔住係唔夠但我都應該要講﹐ 我真係真心去挽救我地依段7年既婚姻﹐ 我知係自在我地是否願意去做﹐ 我知過程好難﹐ 要時間同痛苦﹐ 但我地如想做一定做得到﹐ 我地唔好再做D傷害大家既事啦﹐ 等我地係今次既經驗學會愛同重新開始。所以請俾大家一個機會同時間。。” 他都無再回復我﹐

事實證明你老公睇你表現。雖然佢冇覆你，但佢睇到你既誠意，跟住佢做佢應該做既野。

努力！加油！

天空之城, 快樂之地

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VKwan

積分: 38391

117^#

發表於 07-1-4 01:40 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

極之同意呢個分析。
另外，佢可能想從中尋找回已經失去與你之間的甜蜜感覺。

PCCW2319 寫道:
I'm sorry to say that, 雖然我地關係仲好唔穩定﹐ 今日他都仲有所要求﹐ 我係有如他所願﹐ 但其間我個心好痛﹐ 諗緊你都同個女仔做過﹐ 我覺得他唔係只屬于我一個人啦。。。我希望大家唔會睇低我依個行為啦。。。

心好痛﹐ 諗緊你都同個女仔做過...............呢個係正常反應。但你應該高興佢仲同你ML , 如果佢唔愛你，佢根本唔想做、唔想同你有任何身體接觸。

我覺得你應該試下盡投入，唔好令佢有"夫顯" or dead fish感覺。呢個時候佢亦可能將你同第三者比較。其實有情趣性生活對男人 or 一段婚姻都幾重要。

我近日忽然發錢寒，要努力搵錢儲錢呀！$$$

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積分: 67993

118^#

發表於 07-1-4 02:13 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

無錯，你諗定後路係應該，但請你要小心，不要讓他知道，否則，一切努力都可以化為烏有

Pegbrain,

agree !

私家精探d資料/報告，你一定唔可以帶返屋企，預防你老公唔覺意搵到，咁就一切努力都可以化為烏有架啦。

用d $$ 去bank開個保險箱(自己名)，放哂私家精探d資料/報告，以防不時之需。

努力：扮

天空之城, 快樂之地

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CLBT

複式洋房

積分: 226

119^#

發表於 07-1-4 04:01 |只看該作者

Re: 請各位男人同女人都俾D意見俾我。。

兩夫妻,不要說FACE了!有家庭有仔仔!要好好想清楚喇。找個平靜和好氣氛的機會和他傾談一下問題可是好方法。

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