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Will u be happy with this maid of mine?



發表於 05-2-13 09:34 |顯示全部帖子

Will u be happy with this maid of mine?

My maid came to work for me in mid Nov (3 months ago). She was a local hire & she requested to go home to attend her daughter's wedding in Dec. I said I could not let her go so quickly, I suggest her to consider going in Jan or Feb & that her daughter postponed her wedding - she has a child & is pregnant again with the same man, the delay does not matter.

I kept discussing about when she should go home. Then I suggested her to go before the chinese new year as I needed her back during the festive season. Meanwhile, her daughter changed the wedding date to late Jan. So I thought this was a mutual decision until yesterday she said I forced her to go home!

Having only worked for me for 1.5 months, she said she did not have enough money for her daughter's wedding & asked me to lend her $4,000 plus her 2 weeks salary for Jan which was not due till she came back on Jan 31. Rationally, I did not want to lend her any money at all. I, being a new employer, is not responsible for her family matters. Besides, she has worked in HK for 15 years, why hasn't she saved some money! In the end, I lent her the money.

She did come back as promised. Yesterday, I told her 3 things I wanted her to improve - I did not scold her, I just told her firmly.

1. I asked her to take my son to brush his teeth every morning for a few times. One morning at 11am, my son still has not done it. That was not the first time. She said she asked many times but my son still did not want to.

2. One night I asked her to bath my son & peed before he drank milk & slept. When she came out of my son's room with an empty bottle, she said my son was too tired, he fell asleep. She didn't insist because I had guests in my house that night & didn't want to make my son cry.

3. I bought 2 big radish to make a dish one night treating my friends for dinner. She was the one to cook it. She saved half a radish up for the following night (when I have other food). I asked her why. She said she thought that was too much radish. I told her, it was my call to decide how much to cook for my visitors. I'd rather cook more than not having enough food to treat.

4. She cried each time I talked to her about her work - twice in 3 months. She is forty something. Why can't she accept her boss' comment!? She always puts up excuses. She said she was not happy because she heard other Philippino maid saying I liked her younger sister more than her (I hired both working together), then she cried! Damn, can't I like one more than the other!?

5. I am not happy with her poor english - open/close the water/light, always uses he for she, him for her & vice versa (I have 1 boy & 1 girl, when she mixes up the pronouns, I think she is talking about my girl when she is referring to my son. I have to figure it out later by myself). I know I cannot ask her to change overnight.....

6. She seldom addresses me as madam when she speaks. She just opens her mouth & talks whether I am facing her or doing something else. So I often miss what she says in the beginning especially given her not-so-clear english! Damn....



發表於 05-2-13 10:03 |顯示全部帖子

Re: Will u be happy with this maid of mine?

hi jsmami,

after reading your story, i think the concern should not be placed on your maid but yourself instead. I,also have similar problems (except that my child will not be due until next month) with my newly hired maid. I would ask myself if i can tolerate her behaviour instead of asking why she cant take boss comments or why she cant improve. It makes thing simple and under control of my hand, if i cant tolerate her, then i find a new maid lor.

for money issues, its your call to decide whether you want to lend her the $$ or not and since you did, i assume you did it out of your own conscious so no need to express unhappiness (not sure if its the right wording cos i feel you were unhappy to lend her the $$ when you said, shes been here for 15 years and why doesnt she saved her own money).

my maid also give me lots of excuses, in fact, everytime she did something wrong, theres an excuses. I told her that its ok to make mistakes but NOT ok to make excuses and if she is not happy for watever reason, she can come and address the issue to me OR she cant resign from my home cos I do not think i need or that i am capable to CONSTANTLY pay attention to her emotions.

as far as english level wise, i think maybe you both have to be more lenient cos english is not her mother tongue.

Re no. 5, i personally will not accept tat, i will tell her straight into her face and ask her to address me before speaking to me.

i hope this does not offend you in any case, just my 2 cents.




發表於 05-2-13 17:17 |顯示全部帖子

Re: Will u be happy with this maid of mine?


1) 個工人話你 force her to take the leave in Jan 05, 我會同佢講, 佢一返工就話要放假, 完全係 out of my planning,我可以大條道理唔就佢, 唔比佢放假. 如果佢係唔想放,咁佢就唔好返去, 想放, 就要大家就.

2) 我唔會借4千蚊同出糧比個工人返家鄉放假. 假---係佢自己要放, 佢冇錢, 又唔係咩c人 'lum' 樓大件事, 佢都要返老家, 就要自己諗辦法. 而家你借錢比佢, 你太好人.

3) 一個在香港打o左工15年ge工人, 又年紀大, 會似住自己經驗豐富, 唔多聽新主人支笛. 所以主人要用好多心機同技巧, 先可以 head 住個工人.

4) 個工人 he/she/it, 攪錯晒, 真係冇辦法, 我個工人都係, 成日叫我仔做 she, her, 而且仲讀錯晒d 音. 想 correct 佢地d口音同 grammer 好難, 同佢地溝通得到, 都叫好彩 (起碼我話個工人, 佢都知我講緊咩, 佢唔係 詐傻扮朦)

5) 原來你請埋佢個妹/家姐同你打工, 咁ge情形下, 有好有唔好. 好ge, 就係佢地姊妹同心為你打工時, 你能 1 + 1 > 2. 但係, 佢地一個唔好, 你想炒佢, 留下來的, 會唔會報復呢?

6) 話親個工人, 佢都出喊招, 我就會問佢有咩事要咁淒涼. 我都係想佢 make improvement, 想繼續用佢, 先同佢講咁多o野, 佢下下喊, 係代表佢feel gulity or my words are groundless accusations ? 佢 feel guilty的話, that's fine, 佢以後無需要喊, 只需要跟住指示完成工作, 有 improvement 便是. 如是後者, 個工人 都無需要喊, 因為我會送佢返老家.

有一個咁ge工人, 真係幾勞氣 (雖然講的都不是什麼大錯, 但係日日對住, 仲要住埋一齊, 做僱主的是會幾唔開心架). 而家惟有同個工人講下囉, 叫佢改變下d 態度同做事作風, remind 佢而家你先至係佢 boss, 唔好以佢以前個 boss o個一套加入落呢一個家上面囉.) 個工人再冇改善, 就請佢走.



發表於 05-2-13 22:10 |顯示全部帖子

Re: Will u be happy with this maid of mine?

spellinbee & birdbird,
Thanks for responding. I left the message this morning just to express my feeling. There is no solution to the problem, except to take it or leave it (keep her or fire her). I have not spelt out everything about her that I find irritating. If she does not improve, she needs not improve anymore.



發表於 05-2-13 23:23 |顯示全部帖子

Re: Will u be happy with this maid of mine?

It is really not easy to find a good maid!



發表於 05-2-15 10:35 |顯示全部帖子

Re: Will u be happy with this maid of mine?


由於你請兩姊妹, 如果要留就留兩個, 如果要炒亦都要兩個一齊炒, 萬一你炒一個唔炒一個, 留番個 "種" 係度, 會對你不利的, 點知佢會唔會 "姊妹同心, 整鑊你金", 下次請工人, 最好請兩個完全冇啦冇lung的, 就算走左一個, 另外果個都唔會有咩懷恨心理。 現階段, 我諗你要同佢坐低傾傾, 如果真係傾完之後都冇改善, 情況依舊令你谷氣的話, 少不免要炒換過個啦。

唉! 以為返工先至會 "人事鬥爭", 勢估唔到o係屋企都要受工人氣。

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發表於 05-2-15 11:13 |顯示全部帖子

Re: Will u be happy with this maid of mine?

What a "姊妹同心, 整鑊你金" :mrgreen: !
The younger sister is really quite good. She cooks well (though she worked in HK for only 2 years, she learnt the chinese cooking from a por-por). She takes good care of my younger daughter & she knows how to set limits for my son - she won't be manipulated like her elder sister.

Though it is a bit early to say, I think I won't renew contract with the elder sister to control the damage - my son learns some Philippino-Cantonese accent & tone from her & her english is horrible!



發表於 05-2-17 10:15 |顯示全部帖子

Re: Will u be happy with this maid of mine?

"tin ah"! My maid dipped the radish cake ("law-bart-go") into egg to pan fry!!!!! 15 years working in HK! She did it without the egg the first time she cooked for me. How come she totally forgot what to do. This is the problem I have with her. If u teach somebody something & she does it right the first time, u expect she has learnt it & u don't have to teach her again! Do I need to hire somebody to supervise her!

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